Facebook Activity



Teen Ink on Twitter

Home > Forums > Writers' Workshop Forums > Poetry & Lyrics > Can somebody please give me a little feedback on this?

Writers' Workshop Forums

Where teen writers share their work
   
Next thread » « Previous thread

Can somebody please give me a little feedback on this?

Triscuits posted this thread...
Oct. 9, 2013 at 3:21 pm

I am thinking of entering the writing contest at a local university, I would love to hear your thoughts and criticisms on this one. Thank you in avance!
 
When a child is small,
They have something
To bring them comfort in times of
Stress and sadness;
Some even keep it
Into adolescence
Or adulthood.
For some, it is a blanket
Warm and soft,
Or worn to mere threads
By love and time;
For others, it is
A lumpy, stained animal,
Held so tightly
And for so long
That it slumps
When sat upright.
Everyone has
Some form of
Security blanket:
Books were mine.
Enveloped in words,
Immersed in stories,
Warmed and comforted
Simply from a character’s presence.
When I am sad
Or anxious
Or happy
Or excited
Or stressed
I still reach for my security blanket,
It stays close to me
At all times,
Never leaving
My sight.
Whether it is
Laughter
Or tears
Or screaming
It is there-
My security blanket.

Reply to this Thread Post a new Thread
Jnldnk7 replied...
Oct. 9, 2013 at 7:36 pm

I love it and the idea of it! I can really relate to it as well, I have no constructive critisicm on it just wanted to say it's rly relatable lol

Reply to this Thread Post a new Thread
justyourginger replied...
Oct. 11, 2013 at 12:27 am

I've never really though about books like that but now I read this I realized its so true. Enter with this and I think you'll win

Reply to this Thread Post a new Thread
Tarah18 replied...
Oct. 15, 2013 at 8:50 pm

Yess beautiful! I soo agree! thats the same with me! I fall in love with characters, cry when the characters cry, laugh when they laugh, die when they die. Its actually slightly unhealthy... but anywho! Beautiful poem I wasn't sure at first but ONCE you compared books to security blankets, I WAS HOOKED! 

Reply to this Thread Post a new Thread

Launch Teen Ink Chat
Site Feedback