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Contemplating (ssb)

CONTEMPLATING (ssb)

"Fear is what stops us from doing many things. If that fear was conquered, what would happen? Would everyone have the courage to so something or would there just be more obstacles?"

I'm so scared. What should I do? Can I go now? Why am I here? Who am I? So many questions, so little time. I'm sitting in this chair. Who knows how long? I've just been sitting; waiting, waiting for nothing. The room is black, pitch black. No detail is revealing, only the darkness of the room shows itself.

I hear the mice scurry across the floor, their little claws making a click clack sound on the cold cement floor. I then notice the horrible stench coming from the room. I hadn't noticed it before, what is it? Its metallic, then I hear the sound of dripping and cries of agony. Its blood. Another scream breaks through the silence, followed by another, then another, and another...

I wake up soaked in sweat and screaming. Then I remember where I am. I'm in a homeless shelter, all alone with no family at all. No one to rely on or to care about. 12:03 A.M. I grumble and gather my things to leave again; I've got no where to go.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Walking on the streets of this place is a nightmare. No one knows who I am, I don't even know how I am. Is not knowing your own self a fear? My whole life I've been afraid. Afraid of everything? I keep walking, but I stop suddenly. Am I too afraid to keep going? I see the people passing by me but its all just a blur. Their shouts fade to murmurs as I start to question this fear when all movement around me slows. The colors drain from the city like a cup of water being emptied. It turns black and white and I am alone in this big city.

Time is trivial. It takes so much away, yet gives us everything. The people around me, what do they think of me? Who am I to them? So many questions to be answered, but not a mind to do so. I continue walking down this busy street, with all movement ceased. The dream I had; it still makes no sense to me.



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