Three Deep Breaths

August 12, 2011
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Three deep breaths. That's what Dr. Felips told me to do when this happens. Three deep breaths. I close my eyes, and ignore the bloody floor. Three deep breaths. One, two .... wait, what is that? I never noticed that before. She's wearing a ring. An engagement ring. I reach out and touch her pale hand, those are beautiful hands.

My hands start twitching, I can feel it again. I want to do it. I have to. I can see my face change in the mirror. My eyes are nothing but slits now, my expression cold and hungry. My breathing quickens, blood starts pounding in my ears. I need this.

I turn around and start looking for a knife. She was a chef, I've seen her at the restaurant down the street, she has to have a knife. I get up and look around the apartment. It's dark but I can still see the blood on the walls. That's where I ..... where I .....


Three deep breaths. That's what Dr. Felips told me to do when this happens. Three deep breaths. I close my eyes, ignore the bloody walls in front of me. Three deep breaths. One, two ... wait, what is that? It's a shard of glass. A shard of glass sharp enough to do it. It's happening again. My fingers are burning to hold the glass. I take a step and feel glass crumble under my shoes. The sound awakens my senses even more.

I bend down and pick it up. There's some blood on it. Good. I want it that way. I get up again and start making my way towards her body. There's pictures of her everywhere. I can see her face. She's smiling at me. She's in a man's arms in one of them. He's laughing.

I don't know why, but that picture calls to me. I get closer, and look closely. She's not wearing a ring in this one. She's in a dress too. Pretty girl, she must've been off to a party. She has green eyes, I never noticed that before. Interesting .... I wonder what those eyes would look like if I use this glass to .... to ...


Three deep breaths. That's what Dr. Felips told me to do when this happens. Three deep breaths. I close my eyes, ignoring the shard of glass in my hands. Three deep breaths. One, two ... wait, what is that? Those shoes ... they're gorgeous. I want them. I look down at my own shoes, they're army boots. Covered with blood and glass. I don't want them anymore. I bend down and take them off. Hmm .... should I put her shoes on instead? No. I want to feel the glass on the floor. I want the blood to cover my feet and toes.

Where's that shard of glass? There it is. What do I do with it? Her eyes? No, the glass is too big. Her fingers? No, it's not sharp enough. I should go back to the bedroom. I want to find something for this glass. I make my way towards it, and feel the glass piercing my feet as I do. Ahhhh, yes, this is what I need.


Three deep breaths. That's what Dr. Felips told me to do when this happens. Three deep breaths. I close my eyes, ignoring the pain in my feet. Three deep breaths. One, two ... wait, what is that? Matches. On the coffee table in the living room. Candles? Yes, that's why the matches are there. I want them. I want them now. I look around, there's wood everywhere. Yes, even better. Again, I feel glass under my feet, but no pain. No, I feel no pain anymore. I'm getting closer to them, I'm almost there.

Got them. Slowly, I pull a match out. I light it. The glow of fire in the dark bloody room makes me feel safe. It's all going to be alright. I just have to do what Dr. Felips told me. I look around the room, there's a wine bottle on the chair. I open it, and start pouring it all over the floor. The smell of it mixing with the blood. Mmmm, this is intoxicating.

It's finished, I'm ready to do this. I light another match, and slowly take three deep breaths. I close my eyes, and ignore the roar of fire in the room. Three deep breaths and this will be over. One .... The smell of wine and blood is gone now, just fire. Everywhere. I ignore that. Two .... I can feel the fire creeping under my feet. Three.





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someone said...
Aug. 18, 2011 at 4:49 pm
Simply breathtaking! 
 
sk8r117 said...
Aug. 17, 2011 at 3:59 pm
Love it!!! so happy for u xxx =D
 
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