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I hear my feet pounding at the ground, almost as if there’s someone else behind me. I don’t think about what I’m doing, I just run. I’m panting, my heart thumping against my lungs.

I don’t know how I got like this, I just am. I am running for things that matter to me. I am panting because of the feeling when I stop. I want to stop, but something inside me says I’m not allowed.

I see a wall in front of me. A thought of panic flashed through my pounding head before disappearing. A powerful force takes over and I see a way around it. I quickly do some calculations. Before I know it, I’m airborne.

I wind up clawing at the wall, trying to get over it. The force takes over again, and I’m on the other side, light blinding my sweaty face.

I wish I could stop running, but I know something bad will happen if I don’t. So I keep running, trying not to think about anything other than the complete fear that engulfs me.

Oh, how I wish I could slow down, gulp water down my throat, feel comfort wash over me. I can’t. I keep running.

I can’t do it anymore. My chest feels like it’s going to rip open any second. I can’t feel my feet. I don’t want to stop, but I do. And I succumb to darkness.




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AilsaThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Jan. 10 at 6:35 pm:
some things seem repetative but overall acurate and intressesting
 
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TheLostRomanticThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Dec. 8, 2012 at 7:44 pm:
from reading your comments and replies and from the poem itself i see what you were trying to do here, but it would be much lovelier with a diffrent word choice :)
 
ThornThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Jan. 6 at 12:15 am :
I agree. I deleted most of my old articles because my writing style changed, but I kept this one simply because it had gotten the editor's choice check mark thingy. 
 
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Toby.This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Jul. 5, 2012 at 11:55 pm:
Like a nightmare with no reasoning. I love it. :)
 
Aeliss-NovakThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Aug. 21, 2012 at 12:42 am :
I was thinking the exact same thing!
 
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Dominicano_Loco said...
Jul. 30, 2011 at 5:38 pm:
I think what is most interesting is that it reverts to the sole source of the running being a root emotion all humans feel and try to flee from. It doesn't say what it is, or why we must flee from it, but it makes a strong impact in that sense. Well done Thorn. :)
 
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SilverLunaThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Sept. 13, 2010 at 4:49 pm:

I like it, it lacks...hmm, substance...? But I think that instead adds a level of mystery rather then it lacking something! Great job!

Take a look at some of mine?(:

 
ThornThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Sept. 13, 2010 at 5:23 pm :
Hey, the lack of substance is on purpose. It's part of my theory. Thanks for commenting. I will definitely try to look at some of your work.
 
SilverLunaThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Nov. 23, 2011 at 4:20 pm :

Wow...this comment was made forever ago. Before we were friends even. I think we talked about that the last time we saw each other. We should talk about it again.

Hey, Thorn? I MISS YOU BUNCHES, CHICKADEE!!

 
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mandapanda9736 said...
Jul. 22, 2010 at 3:16 pm:
lovely!!!!!!!
 
Alyse B. replied...
Jul. 30, 2010 at 9:56 pm :
This was inspiring. You're work is fantastic, keep writing.
 
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beautiful_but_torn said...
Jul. 15, 2010 at 2:35 pm:

This was inspiring!

And This makes me want to get up and run a marathon.

Kee up the good work seetie, I loved it!:]

 

 
beautiful_but_torn replied...
Jul. 15, 2010 at 2:36 pm :

*keep

*sweetie

Sorry, typos!

 
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sleeplessdreamer said...
Jun. 29, 2010 at 9:26 am:
I love short fiction-- especially stuff like this without a background. But when you write short things like this, there has to be some sort of intangible flow. While you had that in some spots, you lost it in others. You repeated a few phrases like whether or not you wanted to stop running, and the fact that you "kept running". Find new and creative ways to say those things. Other than that, I really like the idea and I think if you tweak it just a little bit, this could become really fantastic... (more »)
 
redfer This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Jun. 29, 2010 at 6:12 pm :
This held my attention the whole time--very suspenseful and I loved that it was concise, yet potent. Well done! ^_^
 
Healing_Angel This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Sept. 16, 2010 at 10:19 pm :
Very interesting concept as well as technique. I was surprised. It gives a complete story in very few words. well done and keep writing!
 
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