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Clearence CHAPTER 1

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April/20/2010
As days went this one mad the top of the list titled horrible and borderline intolerable... He was gone now. Black hair faded into gray. Eyes shone a light luminescent blue had dimmed to a stare, and now there was nothing left of him.

“Sometime yesterday” I said as I looked up from my large old journal my father had given me, with papyrus sections that I would add over time just so I could write another entry. The ladies in front of me stood in all black. One with pumps and a small summer land dress that flared out at the waist hair undone and wildly curly. The other was a blonde slim statuette woman wearing a slinky cocktail dress and leather high heeled boots. Her thin icy blue eyeballs that could sear your soul. These are the two mothers’ I most significantly remember. “Oh my I’m terribly sorry. How did this happen?” I always though how stupid it was that people would say sorry and then talk about the issue like its okay because you apologized, Of course it wasn’t but my lips were sealed I was never a social butterfly, and these “ Grieving Consolers” were tap dancing all over my tear ducts , and last nerve. You know those people who jus will not let a matter go or can not understand that we simply DO NOT WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT, and yet they insist upon the subject? This would be the definition of my last two mama dearest’s here, Angelina Lopez long hair dark eyes and a whole lot of Latina in her with a sweet smile and kind heart was Jaclyn Richards polar opposite frozen ice eyes the spitting image of the heart she owns, and beauty of a young 20 year old to boot, She is my currant mother whom was the prime suspect on my father’s murder. I believe she did it, but who is going to listen to a 16 year old girl who has home schooled herself whom apparently is ill-mannered, no lessons, and dirty ratted teenager? I’d like to give them a lesson with an uppercut to the jaw. B******ds. It was then that I was summoned to an adjoining room. A man in a white cotton shirt brown soled shoes and a nasty off green suit stood waiting for me, He offered me his hand but I stepped back for if I took that wrinkly worn hand I would know everything about him I titled my head. “Who are you?” He gave me a crooked grin and dropped the hand to land at his waist. “I am Mr., Joles and I’m here on behalf of your father’s will.” My mouth dropped like it was holding the weight of the world. “Then why speak with me?” I asked as I finally seized control of my mouth again. He smiled awkwardly “You own all of his passions therefore all possessions. Including this” he handed me a crinkled sheet of paper ones you see from old movies when the guy in the monkey suit turns to you and says madam you are receiving $!” I tried to comprehend what was going on around me and heave a sigh, composed unruffled self-control. I gave a feeble smile and nods taking the document and turning to leave as soon as I went into the other area I went to my journal picked it up and pulled open the church doors it’s time to figure what the heck my father was doing in the darkness the late nights the cellar and the screams ...it was time to finally know the awful..Terrifying …heart thwarting truth… because she had to know what secrets were buried in this Hell Hole





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Vagabond said...
Jul. 16, 2012 at 5:01 am

hey nice!

why dont you convert it to a book??

 
AsIAm This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Sept. 21, 2010 at 9:24 am

The Good: This is a good idea, and the emotions are nice.  I would like to read more!

The Bad:  Your writing didn't shine in this piece - the sentences were drawn-out and rushed, and multiple gramatical errors slurred your meaning.

The Random:  I think with a little more revision, this could be really great!  Keep working at it! :)

 
JohnWallOfTheWizards said...
Jun. 17, 2010 at 12:29 am

Nice very nice, I really liked this peice although it had quite afew grammatical mistakes, such as

I always thought how stupid it was that people would say sorry and then talk about the issue like its okay because you apologized,

Those were both mistakes found in the piece, but who cares, this is just a draft I suppose.

Reaper Part four is up, tried to get to you before, about it couldn't find out how, Also writing prequel could use some help.

Again y... (more »)

 
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