I wake up to find myself face to face with man’s maker. He told me to sit down and have a little chat with him. I sit down and wait. “You disappoint me my son I made you to be better,” he said. “I’m sorry I tired my best but this is what I am,” I said. “You are better than this and I should know. I thought you would change yourself on your own but for some reason you did not,” he said. “I am what I am and that is the end of it,” I told him. “You are just like your father and his father too. I did the same thing with them and now it is up to you to choose. They had to choose the road they wanted and now it is your turn. They told me the same as you have and picked the road that fit. You can choose your fate now and live with it forever,” he told me. “What are you talking about? I just can’t choose that easy,” I said. “Why not Josh?” he asked. “I have to think about it and talk to some people to help me choose,” I said. “Why do you have to do that? Your whole life my made desions base on what you wanted and only on what you wanted. Why now all of the sudden do you have to ask people?” he asked. “I don’t know I always ask people for help,” I told him. “No, you don’t trust me I know. You think you do but you brush off the ones that love you,” he said. “No, I don’t those are the only ones I listen too,” I told him. “Josh I know all okay. Trust me I know the truth and what you are telling me is not it. You break the hearts’ of many and mostly the people who love you,” he said. “No, I don’t I swear. I love them as much as they love me. I would never hurt them,” I told him. “Oh is that right Josh?” he asked. “Yeah that’s right I would know if I did that,” I said. “Okay then Josh what about this situation? Last year on your girlfriends Sam birthday you took her to the movies and after you left to go play basketball at the gym with your friends. When you dropped her off that night at her house she went in her room and cried the whole night. That wasn’t love Josh that was you doing whatever you wanted to,” he said. “What is wrong with that? I took her to the movies and we had a great time. Then I went to play basketball what is wrong with that?” I told him. “Okay fine then how about this one. Two months ago you told your parents you would be home at eight o’clock. You ended up coming home at three in the morning. You could of gave them a call to let them know that you were going to be later but no you had them stay up and worry all night because you wanted to do what Josh felt like,” he said. “So what I forgot to call them wow big deal,” I told him. “Okay Josh you always think you are right but most the time your wrong. So here is the deal. This is once in a lifetime offer. There are two roads you can take. Th first one is the same road you’re on now and you will finish off your life the way you are now. The second one is the road to change. If you choose this road you will be a better man. This road is not easy but it is worth it,” he told me. I sat there a thought for a while. I thought about all the things he said and the hearts that I broke. “If I choose road two will I still enjoy life?” I asked. “More than you will ever know Josh,” he said. “Okay then I choose road two. I feel that it is time for me to change and become better,” I told him. “You picked the right one Josh,” he said with a smile on his face. He lays me back to bed. I wake up with a new day. I remember a little of it wondering if it was a dream or not. I guess I have the rest of my life to find out.
December 5, 2008