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Genesis

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This is the book of the generations of Janet, the Hominid. Her generations' story was passed down many times until now, when it is written for the first time. I am Derek and I would like to share this story about my ancestors.
Janet was of the Australopithecus genus, a type of animal that is no different from a monkey. Her kind originated from Ethiopia. Once, Ethiopia had an endless sea of trees. But the forest started drying up and its trees were dying, so they had to travel a lot to find food and areas where there were trees and water. But the traveling distances were too far for them to walk so they got tired easily. When Janet was four, she decided to do a little experiment- she tried walking on two legs instead of four. She found that it was so much easier to travel this way and she told everybody and they started doing it. Janet died a hundred years after she discovered about walking on two legs.

Janet had three sons called Seth, Reuben and Cain. They liked playing together…violently. One day, Seth punched Cain’s back and they heard a crack. After this happened, Cain was able to stand up straight. Everyone else wanted that too, so they started punching each other’s backs. Everyone’s genes started mutating and thus, every baby could stand up straight. That was not all they did for their people. About fifty years after that, they created a game where they had to try to pull as much fur as possible from each other’s bodies. They found that all three of them were furless and it was better because it was more cooling. Everyone wanted this and everyone started pulling the fur off one another. Cain saw that it wasn’t right that they shouldn’t have fur at all, so he only pulled the fur off everywhere but his head. And again everyone wanted the same thing and again everyone did the same and again their genes started mutating so that the babies were furless when they were born and grew fur only on their heads. They could be now be classified as a Homo, which means human.

Only one of the three brothers mated- Seth, that was, and he begot Isaac, who begot Samuel, who begot Rachel and Jacob and Rachel died. Jacob begot Adam, who later begot Enoch and Isaac and Enoch mated Leah, who died with a miscarriage. And Isaac mated Sophie and begot Noah, who begot Elizabeth, who begot Gareth, who also helped everyone evolve. The homo species at that time could only swing their arms to a limited degree. Gareth was aware of this situation and he did a body check up on his friend, Micah. He cut through Micah’s skin with a sharpened stone and saw bones. He took out a bone that seemed to have no use at all. Micah realized that he could swing his arm anywhere. Gareth did the same to Micah’s other arm and soon everyone else wanted it so Gareth helped everyone remove their bones and did the same to himself. Soon their genes started mutating and- you know the rest.

Yes, indeed, Janet was my ancestor and so was Cain, Reuben and Seth and so was Gareth. Don’t believe me? Well come to my house and I’ll show you my family tree.



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