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Story of the Demons

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When I woke up, the first thing I noticed was that I was lying in a bed. When the memories of the past who-knows-now long came rushing back to me, I wondered why would our kidnappers give me a bed? The next thing I noticed was that my friends were hanging on the wall. They were shackled and hung by their wrists, 2 feet off the ground. Charlotte, Violet, and Sara were still out cold, their heads hanging down as they mumbled in their sleep, but Andrea was wide awake. Her eyes were filled with fear.
    "Natalie!" She whispered urgently "This is the place. It's where I was kept prisoner. You have to leave, NOW!" I surveyed our cell. It was exactly like I thought Andrea described it. A dark cave, lit by torches hung on the wall. Two tunnels led on to other caves on either side. Nothing was barred. I could easily make my escape, but I couldn't just leave these girls (who had saved my life more than once) to possibly their deaths. Though, maybe I could find the key. I began to devise a plan when I heard a new voice. A man's voice.
    Through the right entrance, the masked man strode in, still wearing his mask.
    "Natalie!" he said warmly "I see that you've awoken. Would you like some food? Water? Anything for you."
    "Why did you bring us here?" I asked firmly. I had no weapon, and knew no defense besides a feeble punch. If we were to escape I would need to think our way out of this.
    The man sighed. "Down to the point I see. As you wish dear. Come, follow me." He gestured for me to follow him out the right gate. I looked to Andrea for guidance. She shook her head urgently.
    "Don't go!" she hissed "He'll hurt you!"
    "Silly girl." the man said "Just because we weren't as kind to you, doesn't mean we will hurt Natalie. Besides, our violence was just." What sort of violence would be just?! I thought. When the man looked in my horrified eyes, he said "Alright, I will even give you back your dagger, so if I hurt you. You can hurt me. That's fair, isn't it?" He pulled a dagger from his belt. It was to small, and to dull, but it was better than nothing. And I wanted to see why he was treating me so much better than the others.
    "Ok, I will go with you. IF you promise to let my friends and I go in the next hour." The man sighed again.
    "I suppose. An hour is all the time we need." I didn't like where this was going, but I followed him into the tunnel.
    We went into a furnished room with a wooden door. It had two wooden chairs and a rock table. The man gestured for me to sit. I remained standing. He shrugged and sat down.
    "Natalie. I'm sure you've figured out by now that you’re demoness." I nodded, and he continued. "Long ago, demons were created out of rock, mud, and fire by the three fates, or that is how it is told. The fates created the demons to become a thriving culture. To help balance the world, at it's primitive state. And to help the human race become as powerful as it was ment to be. For centuries, the demons did as the were supposed to. The educated the humans, taught them to farm, and write, and become a great society. They were two cultures, side by side. Helping each other to become the best they could be.
    Then, the great flying creatures from the north, wandered into our lands. They sought food and water.  Demons were terrified of the creatures, but the humans seemed, attracted, to them. They befriended the creatures, and called them dragons. At first, they only used their new-found friends to fly and build great fires, and hunt, but they realized the dragons could be used for so much more. They were a weapon. The leaders of the humans, ordered an attack on the demons. Hoping to gain more power from fear than friendship.
    The attack worked. They burnt the demon city, and killed or enslaved every last demon. For centuries they toiled. Enslaved for the race they had created, doing the most menial jobs everyday without rest. Eventually, the demons had a rebellion. They escaped their homes through force, and ran to hide in the woods. The humans had their "dragon riders" scour the land for the demons. That order is still in effect today. The humans are still hunting demons Natalie. Their still trying to kill every last one of our kind. The race that we brought from the darkness of caves, to the glory of an empire, is trying to kill us." The man had been pacing around the room. He looked at me now with tears in his eyes. "They will stop at no end, until our race is extinct. But you. You Natalie Harpent, have a way to stop them."
    "Me?" I asked "How could I stop the dragon riders? I don't even want to!" At this the man grew angry.
    "DON'T WANT TO! They are the one's killing our kind. They are the one's who killed your parents! And you don't want them dead?!" Wait, they had killed my parents. As realization hit, I was filled with anger. I wanted blood. The blood that had spilled from my parents bodies that I had found as they were laying dead in the snow. I wanted revenge.
    "How can I stop them?"
    "Do you realize who have been traveling with?" said the man "Do you realize how significant those girls are in this world? Violet alone, who is the most timid, took out a whole ship of Sardilian pirates when she was 10. Andrea, has taken on the entire Neplun market, just for a single egg. Charlotte could take over this entire country by force if she wanted to. If you take out these girls, you will cripple the dragon riders enough to crumple their entire organization, enough for a demon invasion." He pointed to the knife I was holding. "This knife is made of demon crystal. Bring it out, and it could make them go blind from the torture just by looking at it. If you stab them in the heart, it's a slow and painful death, taking up to two weeks. They will go mad with pain, lame from torture, and by the end they will be begging for death."



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Purplefeary134 said...
Mar. 13, 2012 at 7:24 pm
Holy shcnitzel berries!!!!!!!!more more more more more more more more more more more more....please :)
 
wordbeater replied...
Apr. 6, 2012 at 2:19 pm
I liked the concept, but there were definitely some grammatical errors throughout the story. I also agree with the complaints of it being choppy. I think that could be fixed if you vary your sentence lengths more often and slow down the pace of the story by giving more description etc. But it has very good bones so definitely keep going! I'm sure the farther you get into this the better it will flow. 
 
IfYoureMad-KillWithKindness replied...
Apr. 8, 2012 at 10:31 am
Well yeah I agree but if she's like me and writes in her notes on her iPod or iPad then there are going to be grammatical errors, it's just unavoidable
 
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