Selcouth | Teen Ink

Selcouth

February 27, 2015
By howitends BRONZE, Cleveland, Ohio
howitends BRONZE, Cleveland, Ohio
1 article 0 photos 8 comments

Selcouth, in truth, was the only word that could be used to describe him. He was perched on the edge of his seat like a bird ready to take flight, foot tapping against the pegs of the stool as if he couldn’t wait to get in the air. Long fingers pecked feverishly at the keys of a worn-out typewriter, eyes—which seemed to contain colors not yet named—darted to and fro, and breaths escaped quietly from his halfway parted lips like infinitesimal whispers of his innermost thoughts.

 


His hair, however inconspicuous it had seemed at the beginning, was burned into her mind like sunlight on a summer’s day. White-blonde strands glimmering in the blinding rays coming through the window; they glowed like a dangerously hot fire, and she really couldn’t help but stare. In the same way that humans cannot look away from a train wreck, and cannot resist that which is most harmful to them, she wanted to reach out and touch the soft whiteness with just the tips of her fingers. But she, again like most people, was scared of being burnt and so she tucked her hand into her pocket and forcefully turned away.

 


But he was still visible from the very corner of her eyes. His long, gangly legs—covered by a layer of pewter corduroy—spilled out over the stool, his oxford-clad feet resting lightly on the dark mahogany floor. His sweater—half tucked into his pants and half hanging out messily—was of a cream color, thickly knit, and showed only the hint of a blue collar peeking through at the base his neck. Casual as he looked and frantic as he seemed, he was captivating.

 


She, however, had work to do. And so, with fierce determination, she tilted her face away from the stunning creature beside her and began.



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This article has 4 comments.


on Mar. 15 2015 at 11:22 am
BreeZephyr SILVER, Broken Arrow, Oklahoma
7 articles 0 photos 84 comments

Favorite Quote:
“In the moment when I truly understand my enemy, understand him well enough to defeat him, then in that very moment I also love him...it's impossible to really understand somebody, what they want, what they believe, and not love them the way they love themselves.” - Orson Scott Card, Ender's Game

Your descriptions are beautiful and I love your word choices (I love vocabulary, so "selcouth" is just a gem of a word to me). I would warn you against using fancy description too often, though--make sure that you alternate between long, elaborate sentences and short, simple ones. But still, this little story is lovely. I loved the part about humans being unable to resist what is harmful to them--so true. And by the way, is that hinting at a dangerous nature in this guy?

Beila BRONZE said...
on Mar. 15 2015 at 3:41 am
Beila BRONZE, Palo Alto, California
3 articles 0 photos 516 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco." -Mark Twain

Your descriptions are very powerful, and I love the way you've characterized him with such an archaic word right off the bat. I can definitely envision him easily. The only thing is... nothing's happened! I wanted to read more! I'm super curious: What is he writing? Who is she? Have they met before? What is she working on? Has he noticed her? Also, a quick note of caution: Sometimes, extended descriptive sentences can begin to seem monotonous if you forget to vary sentence structure. There is virtue to knowing when to and when NOT to describe more. Keep that in mind as you keep writing; I'm going to be looking to read it! :)

on Mar. 15 2015 at 12:42 am
Allen. PLATINUM, Palo Alto, California
32 articles 9 photos 525 comments

Favorite Quote:
[i]No matter how much people try to put you down or make you think other things about yourself, the only person you can trust about who you really are is you[/i] -Crusher-P

I'm captivated by your writing. The descriptions are lush and full of detail, and they make me want to know what'll happen next... Your vocabulary, also, is amazing. Will you write more?

LoloG SILVER said...
on Mar. 13 2015 at 7:20 pm
LoloG SILVER, Highlands Ranch, Colorado
9 articles 0 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Becoming fearless isn't the point. That's impossible. It's learning how to control your fear, and to be free from it." -Veronica Roth

This was utterly stunning! Your writing is powerful, and honestly, so much better than anything I ever could have dreamt up. Keep going!