Where Has It Gone? | Teen Ink

Where Has It Gone?

October 24, 2014
By Meekothepenguin BRONZE, Camas, Washington
Meekothepenguin BRONZE, Camas, Washington
1 article 0 photos 0 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I'm pretty, but I'm not beautiful. I sin, but I'm not the devil. I'm good, but I'm no angel." Marilyn Monroe


Empty promises and unrealistic expectations are all he had for me. The words, "I love you," were now meaningless to me as the days went on, my heart breaking a little more with each minute passed. Though we are still together we seem so far apart as I stand here, holding out my arms, wishing for his embrace to captivate me once again. His mind had been somewhere else these last few months, somewhere far away from me. I'm starting to believe I may never get him back. I cherish the memories we made together, but my heart is torn to pieces with the thought that we may never make more of them. I sit on my bed, tears starting to roll down my face as I think to myself, "Where is the man I fell in love with? Where did the goofy boy I knew disappear to? Where is he now, on the journey he is taking without me?" I still smell his scent on the stuffed elephant he gave me on our first Valentines Day. I still feel his fingers linger on my cheek from the night he first kissed me. I still feel his heart beating against my chest from the long ago nights when we danced. He stole my heart these past years, but I don't want it back. Although I am submerged in pain my love still belongs to him and him only and even as it seems he no longer cares, my heart is still his.


He didn't know what to say to her. Of course he loved her, with every fiber of his being, so why was it so hard for him to show it? His mind was unromantic, he thought that as if it was no problem, after all she did say she didn't need romance. But she wanted it. He knew she wanted to feel special, she wanted to feel like she was his world, his princess. He knew how simple it could be, just picking up a cheap bouquet at the super market or writing a small letter. Why couldn't he bring himself to do it? Did he really love her, or had that love he once felt disappeared? Had that flame burnt out, were ashes the only thing he now felt?


"Why is this so hard to show her?!" He yelled in frustration, his hands forming into fists, capturing the dark hair under them. He sat at his desk and thought about how he had won her originally.


His class ring, he gave to her. She wore it around her neck each and every day, letting everyone know that she was his.


The stuffed elephant that he had given her for their first Valentines Day. He knew she snuggled with is each night. She loved how it had told her how he listened to her passions and knew the things she loved. He didn't even remember what her favorite color was anymore.


He had called her each night to tell her he loved her, ask her how her day went, and to say goodnight. When was the last time I called her? He wondered in his brain.


He had showered her with love and compliments, support and encouragement. He didn't know what was wrong with him, why he wasn't doing things for her anymore. All he knew was that he loved her, but she wasn't so sure anymore. He was going to lose her, he knew he had been losing her for months now. He thought ignoring it would make it go away, but it was still there. Slowly she was drifting further away, and the fact of it being his fault was apparent.



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