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Deaf

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I used to know. I used to know how to do everything, understand everything. That was before, and now I can’t. People come to me now and give me looks of pity, but words of normality. They think that just because my ears don’t work, I’m blind as well and can’t see their looks of sympathy. In the past everyone would just joke around and laugh with me, as people usually do. Everything is different now. The doctor says that my hearing will get worse until I’ll be completely deaf.If not for the doctor’s visit I would think the world was just quiet, and I wasn’t deaf, at least I wouldn’t admit to that fact. My closest friends and even my family avoid me like a plague. Before I could listen to the beauty of the world, and I would ignore it. The birds would sing, the wind would howl, but I would be caught up with the fast-paced life I led, as was and is the way of the world. All I have left are memories of that sound. I miss all the things I could do with my voice. Now I can barely speak, and half the time, don’t even know what I’m saying.

The next morning, on Saturday, I went out. The brisk, autumn wind gently swirled around me. I took a walk around the park, following the rocky, gravel trail laid before me. Then the next thing I remember is that he appeared. Him, with his dark, shaggy hair, and golden eyes, with pink lips and pale skin. He looked at me, and his lips moved calling out to me. I couldn’t hear what he said, and signed that “I cannot understand, I’m deaf.” Apparently, he knew sign language too, and walked over and said hello. I don’t know what happened, but he entranced me, and we began talking. The day was filled with some sort of subtle magic. We walked around the path about 7 times, and it was twilight when we said good-bye. “I’ll see you tomorrow,” he said.
I don’t know how he found me the next morning, but I ran into him at church. The service had just ended and I found him standing there talking to the pastor. He spotted me, excused himself, and started to walk toward me. I didn’t understand why, but I couldn’t move. My legs weren’t disabled, but it felt as though iron weights chained me to the earth. Suddenly, he was standing right in front of me. He gave me a grateful smile, and led me out through the wooden doors of the church. We spent the whole day together, and the following Monday he was there as well. I found him talking to the receptionist. This time I went up to him and said hello. I found myself offering to show him around the school. My heart beat increased, as fast as a hummingbird with every step I took. I never noticed anything but him when we were together, it felt so right. I forgot all about what happened to me. I forgot about my friend’s and family’s empathy, and all the other troubles I had. Soon, the day was over. My nerves tired from being over the edge, knowing that he was in my school and that he could be anywhere. But after the tour, I never saw him.
After school, I went over to the football field and he was there. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised, he was almost everywhere I went. Then I saw it happen. The girl he was talking to just leaned up and kissed him. It was after that betrayal he saw me. I didn’t even stop to think, I just ran away fast and hard. My heart was crushed, almost as if I had been holding up the sky, and now it was crashing down over me. It was treason! I wasn’t even aware I was running to the park where I first met him. I just walked around, like a mindless robot, unfeeling and unthinking. The next day, I ditched school. I didn’t see him for the entire day, almost. He found me, he always did. No words were exchanged, only feelings. I was just walking around the park again, and he was there, the same as I first saw him. I didn’t even feel like running, so I just turned my head and stormed off. I saw him following me then, running up and holding me prisoner in his arms. The world didn’t move, and for a second I was blind. All I could feel were his arms binding me, overpowering my weak restraint. His lips were pressed gently to mine, and he kissed me filling my heart with passion and ecstasy I never knew existed. It was in that moment that I knew he was mine. Then everything else didn’t matter anymore. I didn’t care that I was deaf, that my friends and family avoided me, or that he was kissed by another girl. All that mattered was that he was mine. I surrendered myself too him, and the rest of the world just faded away.





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DrowningInTheBrooke said...
Dec. 16, 2011 at 2:27 pm
its sweet :)
 
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