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A Kiss

She walks up the steps onto the bus, and almost as if by habit she looks straight at him. She goes and sits next to him, a smile playing on her face as she says “Hey.” He looks at her and smiles. He says a greeting in return.
She shivers from the cold outside, despite wearing an overcoat while he just wore a jacket. He laughed and asked, “Are you cold?” She nodded, laughing as well. She liked being around him, even if she could be happy for just that moment, it was all worth it. She looks at him from the corner of her eye, wondering what he’s thinking.
Does he think about me when we are apart? Does it really matter?
Her smile fades as she starts to doubt again. She had done it so much; it was more a habit then looking for him on the bus every Sunday. Even though she knew he’d be there. Why do I even think that seriously? It’s not like it matters…
He looks at her as her head is down, her body curled in. “You okay?”
“Y-yeah. I’m fine. Just thinking.” She answered.
“About what?”
She glances up at him, just enough to see his expression. He showed no feeling. “Stuff.”
He leans back and looks out the window. He seemed satisfied with her answer, though to her he didn’t seem like he ever really cared if she was okay in the first place. She sighs, though not meaning to. He glances at her, and she wonders if he’ll ask again. He doesn’t.
His hands are in his lap, as they usually are. She looks down at her own hands, curled into fists. Her stress was getting to her. He looks at her again. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.” She lied. She couldn’t tell him everything that bothered her. It wouldn’t be right.
“Are you sure?”
He seemed to care enough to ask. But, could she really tell him the truth? “Yes,” she lied.
He looked away again. He either figured she didn’t want to talk, or believed her. She wanted to lean into him, but was afraid to. Did he want her to, or was he bothered by it?
The bus was filled, and it began to move. They seemed to be the only people without conversation. It didn’t matter to her. She was sitting next to him, enjoying his company. Was he?
She linked arms with him, resting her head on his shoulder. She left out a sigh of relief as he leaned into her. She slowly closed her eyes, wondering if she could fall asleep with him like this. His hand came up and covered hers, stroking with his thumb. Her stress disappeared, her depression as well. She wouldn’t cry anymore. She felt as though everything was perfect.
After some time, she opened her eyes as he shifted. He gently guided her hand to his, holding it. She felt comforted by this gesture. She wanted to kiss him, as they had tried before. Twice. She couldn’t for all she knew. Yet, she had never tried. The first time she was shocked, the second was only what others would call a peck. It was her first kiss; they couldn’t judge her for that.
She looked at him. He must have felt her looking at him because he looked at her also. Unless he was meaning to look at her.
She wanted to say something, but was afraid to ruin the moment.
“Are you going ice skating today?” He asked. She was surprised to hear him ask what she wanted to know.
“Yeah, are you?”
“Yes.”
“You’re going to help me skate like before?” She smiled remembering how they had held hands, but with a perfect excuse for helping each other.
“Yeah,” He smiled. She wondered if he remembered too.
She leaned up to him wanting to kiss him, but still afraid. He leaned down to her, and pressed his lips against hers. This time, she kissed him. It may not have been perfect, but it was a start. He seemed to have noticed and pulled back smiling. She could feel her face getting hot, but paid no mind. She held his hand tighter, smiling. He sat quietly, as he was always. She listened to his breath, his chest rising. It was calming if nothing else. To know he was alive, to know that someone actually cared about her. She wished she could stay like this forever. I wish I knew what he felt. Why doesn’t he tell me these things? She wondered. They got to his Student Home, and he hugged her tightly, whispering a parting. She sat down and watched as they left. Amongst other things, she still wondered why he never said her name.



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Stephh18 said...
Mar. 14 at 1:48 pm
wow! that romance novel was so good so far!
 
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