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Love Letter: Enough

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Dear ******,
Here I am sitting waiting for you to come, and all i can think about is you. Staring around me, and at everything I stare I see you. I see the couch, the couch we first kissed on, the phone that used to constantly ring. The newspapers that you use to read, the books you hated. Everything reminds me of you it is as if i am sitting in a cloud of memories. Memories of you, and only you.
What about you, are you thinking about me, or at least thought about me. You are happy, calm sitting with the love of your life loving her, while the backup is waiting at home. Waiting for you to come, Waiting for you to knock on the door, waiting as if there is no tomorrow. But you never think or at least try to think. All you can do is lie, LIE, LIE.
You are a liar, one that lies on everyone. Don't you notice that, you lie on me, on her on everyone around? You say you have a meeting and you come to see me, you say they are calling you and you go to see her. But the problem is that I am the secret one. I am the lover, and she is the image. You say you love me, you say I am the one but I don't know why I feel you are lying.
i reach for you, i reach but never get to touch you. I never get to touch your heart; all I get is your solid body that i can live without. In your eyes I see love, but I don't know if it is for me or for her.
"Do you love her the way you love me, or at least pretend to?" Do you love me? Am I real for you or am I just a girl. A girl like all the others you've met, and still constantly meet. The problem is that even though you might not love me, I do. I love you more than anything. I love you and it hurts to admit it. To admit I am in love with a boy, that might not love me. That pretends to love me, that pretends to care when he only cares about the way I kiss him. He only cares about his satisfaction.
The door bell rings I rush toward it like an insane, to open and realize it is the delivery boy. Can you see what you did to me, those eyes of yours casted a spell on me. I wait for you, like a prisoner waiting for his freedom. I need you, like I need air to live. Without you I have no reason to live, without you I have a million reasons to die and none to live. I need you. I do...
The first time I saw you, you were just a customer at my shop but the second time changed everything it changed me and everything around me. I changed to be good enough for you but it seems I can never reach your expectations; I am never good enough for you. I am never right...
I try so hard to please you, I try a lot but sometime you don't notice. Actually all of the time, so I am going to tell you one thing, I know I love you, I know that. I know I'll die without you, I know that. I know I am nothing without you but I can fix that. I know a lot of things but the most important thing I know is that it's enough. I can no longer handle this; I can no longer be the quiet hidden cat in the back. i want to be revealed, and I know you can't do this so...
Good bye, good bye and this time really good bye not like hundred times before. A hug and sorry won't change anything, good bye ******. This is the last you'll hear of me, but you might see me but I'll ignore it.
Goodbye******
Sincerely,












































your lover.... XOXOXO.





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