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My Elizabeth.

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As I stare at the beautiful, red-haired goddess with her head resting gently on my chest I wonder how I possibly managed to get such an amazing girl. Her name is Elizabeth Crowley. She is my day, my night, and the only thing in my life worth living for. I check my watch to se what time it is, it is nearly midnight. No wonder she fell asleep. Her curfew is midnight so I decide now would be a good time to wake her up. I plant a soft kiss on her cheek to wake her up.

Her house is only a few blocks away and we decide to walk, we can make it there before midnight if we leave now. Walking is more work and it takes longer, but it gives us the chance to spend more time together. Another reason for us to walk is I haven’t been fond of driving since the accident. We proceed to walk down the sidewalk hand-in-hand.

When we walk to her house I walk her up to her front porch. As we stand on her porch we say good-bye and goodnight, then I plant a subtle kiss on her lips. I pull her in close to me. I wish I could freeze this moment and live in it forever; just me and her and our eternal embrace. I hear my watch signal the passing of another hour. I realize it is now midnight, so I pull myself away from her. She enters the house, but not without giving me one last kiss.

Why is it so hard for me to say goodbye for her when I know we will be together in less than twelve hours? When we aren’t together it feels like a part f myself is missing. I haven’t worked up enough courage to ask her if she feels the same way. I’m afraid she won’t feel the same and that would put an awkward strain on our relationship.

The next morning I wake up and get dressed as fast as I possibly can, because the longer it takes me to get dressed, the longer it takes me to see my Elizabeth. When I exit the house I see my old car and debate on whether or not I should drive it. It took my father and I seven months to get my car running again after the accident. I’ve driven it a handful of times since the accident, but I have not done so with Elizabeth in the car.

She is sitting on her front porch steps when I arrive at her house. She stands up, her red hair falling to her shoulders, and she begins to walk towards me. A beautiful smile spread across her face.

“When are we going to start driving again?” She asks taking my hand in hers.

“I’m not sure yet.” I say in return.

“Well can you make up your mind soon? Because I’m sick of walking.” She says and we begin walking to school.

“I almost killed you in that car accident and you’re wiling to trust me to drive you around again? Why?” I ask.

“I trust you with my life because I love you.” She says giving me a look I’ve never seen before.

“You’re amazing.” I say. “I guess we can start driving today if you want.”

We turn around and walk back to my house. We get into my old, beat-up, rust-colored mustang. We put our seatbelts on. I start the car. I sit there and stare out the wind shield trying to mentally prepare myself for this; the last time I drove with her in the car was the night of the accident.

“James, are you ok?” Asks Elizabeth and I realize I’m just sitting here staring off into space.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” I say as I start the car and drive to school. The drive to school is surprisingly easy.

We arrive at school to find the halls littered with flyers advertising prom this Friday. I had forgotten all about it. As Elizabeth and I walk down the halls hand-in-hand people shoot us awkward glances. This has been happening a lot since the accident.

School passes by in it’s usual blur of dull geography and algebra nonsense. After school we decide to go to my house to watch movies until it is time for me to take her home. We watch several movies before I have to take her home. That night after I take her home I lay in bed and think about what happened that day; to the moment when she said she loved me. Now I know she feels the same way about me.

The days leading up to prom passed by rather quickly as we continued or daily routine of going to school and watching movies. The night of prom I put on my white suit and wait for Elizabeth to get here so my mom can take pictures. She arrived in a black dress, with her hair done so her bangs fell onto her pale skin.

My mom doesn’t take long to take pictures, but when I reach for the camera to look at the pictures she pulls it away.

“Mom let me see the pictures!” I demand and jerk the camera from her hands. When I look at the pictures the only think I see is myself with my arm out like its around someone.

“What’s wrong with your stupid camera?” I ask handing it back to her.

“I didn’t want to have to do this today but I guess I have to. Elizabeth didn’t make it out of the accident.” She said with a pained expression.

“Yes she did, she’s right there!” I yell as I point to the place where Elizabeth was standing, but she’s not standing there anymore.

“Son, we believe you are suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. It’s turning you into a delusional schizophrenic.” Her expression let me know that this was excruciatingly painful for her to do this.

I storm up to my room. How can I live with myself? I killed the girl that I love, and I’m going insane. I feel like my heart has been ripped out and torn to pieces. I feel completely isolated and alone. There is no possible way for me to live without her. I cannot do it. No I will not do it. I deserve to die. I took her life, so I should give up mine. I have to do it. Ending my life is the only possible way for me to be reunited with my Elizabeth. There is nothing left for me on this world.

I go to my bathroom. I go to the cabinet under the sink, where I find what I’m looking for. I grab the gallon of bleach; there is a little less than half of the bottle left. I down the rest of the liquid. The liquid scalds my throat as it makes its way down.

I lie in my bed and wait for death to come to me. When death finally comes to me I find myself reunited with my Elizabeth. We are finally locked in our eternal embrace.





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Talia12 said...
Jan. 23, 2010 at 12:39 am
wow...i almost cried when i read this at school...but i like totally cried for real when i read it just now.....you're an amazing writer/author..lol..idk what you prefer to be called ( ;
 
Talia12 replied...
Feb. 10, 2010 at 10:27 am
and i was the first person (other than yourself) to EVER read it!!! lol
 
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