Intensity

June 13, 2009
By Lindsey_O GOLD, Marshfield, Massachusetts
Lindsey_O GOLD, Marshfield, Massachusetts
11 articles 0 photos 180 comments

Favorite Quote:
Words slide off the lead,
creating permanent marks;
writer's secret code.
~Lindsey O'Connell


The tears poured off her eyelids; slid down her cheeks; fell to the floor. Slowly she sank to the ground, trembling slightly. Her breath came in deep sobs, wracking her chest. She barely had enough air. She did not hear the soft footfalls coming ever closer. She did not see him as he sat down next to her. She did, however, feel as his arm wrapped around her shoulders. Turning slightly, the girl buried her face in his shoulder. Her friend held her tighter, resting his head in her soft chestnut curls.

The two of them sat that way for what felt like hours; the girl sobbing loudly on the boy’s shoulder, the boy holding her quietly, steadfastly. Finally, the girl released her last tear. She looked up at the boy, eyes red from crying, cheeks flushed. He turned to her, a small crooked smile on his lips. To the girl’s surprise, tears were slipping down his face as well. “Why are you crying?” she asked softly, voice cracking. The boy considered the question for a second.

“I am crying because you are crying,” he replied truthfully as yet another tear trickled down his handsome face. His smile was still there, unwavering.

The girl stared at him with wide eyes. He stared back at her. A chill like an electric current flowed through both of them. The air around them tingled with static. Slowly, as if pulled by some invisible force, the two teenagers moved closer. Their faces were within a hair’s breath of each other’s. “Why me?” she whispered. “Why did you choose me?” Her eyes darted back and forth, looking for an answer written on his face. “You are the only one who’s real. The only one out of all those girls who knows what it means to truly love someone. Even though he broke your heart, you just keep going. I like that. I think… I think I may even love that.”

His eyes gleamed with a passion long suppressed. “I think I may love you.” His sweet breath lingered on her lips. The girl’s heart began to beat frantically, as if trying to keep up with her rapidly changing emotions. “I think I may love you too,” she admitted.

Without meaning to, the girl shut her eyes. The two leaned even closer, closing the gap between them. His soft lips pressed against hers. She wrapped her arms around his neck, and his arms coiled around her waist. The kiss deepened.

Gently, they pulled apart. Both were smiling softly. “Thank you,” the girl said under her breath, so quiet that the boy sitting right next to her wasn’t sure he had heard her at first.

“For what?” She stared deeply into his eyes. He held her gaze, reciprocating the intensity. “For giving me a reason to live again. For saving me from falling.”

“Anytime. Thank you, too. Thanks for letting me in. Thanks for not pushing me away.”

At the same time, the two teenagers said, “I love you,” sealing their fate.

The two leaned in closer, their foreheads, then lips, pressing against the other’s.



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This article has 377 comments.


on Oct. 8 at 10:24 am
Hermione-Granger BRONZE, Bethel Park, Pennsylvania
1 article 0 photos 87 comments
Aw, this is so sweet! I love it!

Likes2Write said...
on Apr. 23 2016 at 3:57 pm
Amazing! It was like there was a movie playing in my head! Keep writing!

on Sep. 8 2014 at 4:14 pm
EmilytheBelleofA. DIAMOND, Athens, Georgia
81 articles 5 photos 1492 comments

Favorite Quote:
To love is to be vulnerable; Triumph is born out of struggle; We notice shadows most when they stand alone in the midst of overwhelming light.

Eeek, I've read this before, and I knew I loved it and still do. I love it. I'm sorry, I forgot to comment until now. This amazingly, beautifully, and wonderfully writen. The story is very sweet. All I can say, is that it's wonderful and sweet. So wonderful. All in all, I think this deserves to be published. I'm glad this has 374 or 375 comments, because you deserve it. It's amazing. Thank you for sharing this!

on May. 21 2013 at 11:32 am
yourlove-mywings SILVER, Yuma, Arizona
7 articles 0 photos 36 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Pay attention to yourselves! If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him, and if he sins against you seven times in the day, and turns to you seven times, saying, ‘I repent,’ you must forgive him.” Luke 17:3-4

yahh.. i agree with Alan B. It was her story, for one. But that doesn't matter. she was just showing us what her heart yearns for. who doesn't want true love like this? that perfect moment when you know he/she is the one? the static in the air? i think it was really well crafted. so, yahh.... if she wants to write a realisitic story, more power to her.

on May. 21 2013 at 11:29 am
yourlove-mywings SILVER, Yuma, Arizona
7 articles 0 photos 36 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Pay attention to yourselves! If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him, and if he sins against you seven times in the day, and turns to you seven times, saying, ‘I repent,’ you must forgive him.” Luke 17:3-4

this was really good. i liked it a lot. i could follow along easily. but the others are right. you need to watch you grammar and whose talking, but i loved the story. it was really really good. congrats!!! keep writing. :D

on Nov. 9 2012 at 8:06 pm
TaylorWintry DIAMOND, Carrollton, Texas
72 articles 0 photos 860 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Never fear shadows. They simply mean there's a light shining somewhere nearby." - Unknown

Great job! Please watch your grammar and puncuation! For example, in the first sentence, the semi-colons should be commas. Also, "hair's breath" is actually "hair's breaDth", which means the width of a hair. Great job and story though!!!

Paige4699 GOLD said...
on Sep. 27 2012 at 4:42 pm
Paige4699 GOLD, Jackson, Rhode Island
11 articles 0 photos 12 comments

Favorite Quote:
To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.

Omg that was so amazing and beautiful :) But may I recommend at some times I was confused at who ws speaking,  so once in a while you may want to add who's speaking :) But great writig. Kepp going!

on Sep. 26 2012 at 7:42 pm
vballgirl99 BRONZE, Atalnta, Georgia
1 article 0 photos 28 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Practice makes perfect"

WOW! Wonderful writing!! Keep it up, please!

on Aug. 17 2012 at 4:10 pm
super8 PLATINUM, Manhattan, Kansas
30 articles 9 photos 21 comments

Favorite Quote:
"You ain't ever gonna burn my heart out!"

What are stories for? Sure, stories like this and Hollywood endings probably never would happen...but that's not why we read them. The author is bringing you into the story of those rare 1 out of 100, and telling it to us in way so we too can expirience these "fantasitc" feelings. I think this is written very well. 

shirli n said...
on Aug. 13 2012 at 4:32 pm
amazing ! bueatifull !!!   u have a gift!  pleace use it i would like to see more of your work ! :) 

Brynna995 said...
on May. 17 2012 at 9:14 am
Brynna995, La Crosse, Wisconsin
0 articles 0 photos 1 comment

This is an amazing piece of writing, the love that every teen wants and dreams of but sadly doesn't really happen that way. maybe to 1 out of the 100 people it might, but i suggest writing another one that seems more realistic, like what teen love is like and not a fantasy for waaay more than half of the people in the world. 

Other wise Great word choice, awesome creativity and keep writing!!! 


on May. 11 2012 at 7:41 pm
_ella_herondale BRONZE, San Diego, California
4 articles 2 photos 224 comments

Favorite Quote:
"...If the Thames that ran beside them...recalled a night where the moon shone as brightly as a shilling on the same boy and girl... and thought to themselves, 'at last, the wheel comes full circle,' they kept their silence."

L-O-V-E it!!!! So pretty and so just..... Inspiring!! Thanks for making my day brighter!!

on Apr. 25 2012 at 1:58 pm
MassieKurh BRONZE, Pittsville, Wisconsin
2 articles 0 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
love is like a tattoo while the process can be painful and the bright vibrant colors form the beginning may fade the product in the end is everlasting.

it is great. i love your writing style. try lengthening it out a little and adding some more details.

on Apr. 25 2012 at 10:54 am
ashley112027 BRONZE, Grand Rapids, Michigan
1 article 0 photos 21 comments

Favorite Quote:
"All you need is 20 seconds of insane courage. Just literally 20 seconds of embarrassing bravery, and I promise you, something great will come out of it."

More please!!! <3

on Apr. 3 2012 at 11:16 am
Zuccini75 BRONZE, Chantilly, Virginia
1 article 0 photos 48 comments

Favorite Quote:
"It is better to keep your mouth shut and let people wonder, than telling them yourself."
-Myself

That was so cute! Keep up the good writing!

on Mar. 20 2012 at 7:47 pm
Perfect-Darkness GOLD, Kennebunk, Maine
19 articles 0 photos 16 comments

Favorite Quote:
One of the hardest things you'll ever have to do is to stop loving someone because they've stopped loving you.

Awww so sweet! I loved it!

on Feb. 27 2012 at 1:26 pm
mylifestarringme BRONZE, Boise, Idaho
2 articles 4 photos 22 comments
This is so beautiful, I just ate it up. Can you give us more:)

on Jan. 7 2012 at 11:15 pm
KeepReading BRONZE, Kansas City, Missouri
4 articles 13 photos 19 comments

Favorite Quote:
“So the writer who breeds more words than he needs, is making a chore for the reader who reads.”
―Dr. Seuss

I agree, although I might phrased it differently. Anyway, when you said, "When did the love happen," it reminded me of a book by Kody Keplinger called The Duff. The Designated. Ugly. Fat. Friend. It's a good read and totally surprising in the way things play out. So if your ever looking for a book to read, you might like it. The same goes to everyone.

on Jan. 6 2012 at 10:16 pm
RayBaytheDinosaur GOLD, Hampton, South Carolina
18 articles 17 photos 159 comments

Favorite Quote:
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder

lol did they just meet and already fall in love xD if only real life happened that way lol. wonderfully written though =)

Fia-fia BRONZE said...
on Jan. 6 2012 at 6:35 am
Fia-fia BRONZE, Bethesda, Maryland
4 articles 1 photo 157 comments
I love this... really it is so beautiful. I also love how its so clear and vibrant in the moment, but outside that, the past and the future is so vague. It gives us a little room to think. Its just a wonderful piece! Thank you :)




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