Defying Love | Teen Ink

Defying Love MAG

May 24, 2009
By awesomeaugust GOLD, Boston, Massachusetts
awesomeaugust GOLD, Boston, Massachusetts
10 articles 0 photos 176 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Keep your eyes on the stars and your feet on the ground"
~Theordore Roosevelt


I didn't want to like him. He was just so charming.

This might sound like every other love story, and it may be, but it may not. If you don't read on, you'll never know.

My name is Emily Brown, which I've always been quite happy with. I think it makes me sound pleasant but ordinary, and I prefer to blend in. Now, I suppose it's only polite to tell you a bit about myself before I jump into my story. I am five feet, two inches, have brown hair that comes to my shoulders, and I am not talented in any special way. These are the basic facts of me, and I think these are all I ought to tell you.

His name was Andrew Rivers and he was perfectly wonderful in every way. When he first came to my school in twelfth grade, he was a bit eccentric and didn't fit in right away. He was into music and played the drums and the guitar, although he wasn't good at either. What he was good at was singing, and when he did, you wanted to cry and laugh and sing along with him all at once.

My name is Emily Brown and his was Andrew Rivers and I loved him.

About two months into my last year of high school, Andrew asked me out. I was surprised since I had hardly ever talked to him, but I didn't have a boyfriend, and I didn't know how to say no.

It may help you to know that at my school there were couples that were simply together for the name, and some that were together only to have a date for dances and for kissing and other such things. When Andrew asked me out I had no idea what his intentions were, and I didn't like having no idea. I'm by no means a confrontational person, but I was starting to feel offended that after I had said that I would date him, he hadn't said another word to me. So I went up to him and we had a little talk.

Me: “Hey, Andrew.”

Andrew: “Hey.”

Me: “So …”

Andrew: (annoyingly, nothing)

Me: “You asked me out.”

Andrew: (nothing again)

Me: “Why?”

Andrew: “Why'd I ask you out?”

Me: “Right.”

Andrew: “I felt like it.”

Me: (irritated) “You felt like it?”

Andrew: “That's what I said, isn't it?”

Me: (infuriated) “I'm sorry. Actually I'm not. I didn't realize you were such a jerk, and I don't want to go out with you anymore.” (I'd never dumped someone before, okay?)

Andrew: “Are you dumping me?”

Me: “What do you think?”

Andrew: “Why?”

Me: “I feel like it.”

Andrew: (smiling) “Do you like Chinese food?”

Me: “I hate it.”

Andrew: “You've never had it.”

Me: “How do you know?”

Andrew: (laughing) “I'm good at reading people.”

Me: “Well, obviously you suck, because I've had Chinese food a million times and I hated it every time.”

Andrew: “Would you like to go out with me tonight?”

Me: “You're asking me on a date?”

Andrew: “Yes.”

Me: “Read my answer.”

Andrew: “Wonderful! I'll see you tonight. Be ready by six. Ish. Sixish.”

I hated this strange boy who I'd only really talked to twice. He made me infuriated. The only problem was, I couldn't figure out if I liked that or not.

That night at sixish sharp, Andrew showed up at my doorstep. My parents have never been into meeting my boyfriends, but as I was stepping out, he stepped in. He walked right into the living room where my parents sat watching the baseball game.

When he came back out I asked, “What'd you say?”

“I told them I'd have you back by eight.”

“Ish?”

He laughed. “Nope. Just eight.”

We didn't talk much on the car ride. He had a CD playing that sounded kind of like Bob Marley, but I'd never heard the song before. It wasn't until we got there that I realized I didn't know where we were going. A small sign stood in front of the building but the name was too peeled away for me to be able to read it. What I could read was the sign beneath where the name should be, and it said, “The best Chinese cuisine for miles.”

“Chinese, huh?”

He smirked.

We walked inside and it was only then that I realized exactly how small the building was. There were little tables in the center of the room, about five of them, and a couch against one wall for sitting while you waited. As if. There was no waiting; we were the only customers. A sign read “PLEASE SEAT YOURSELF,” but I guess because of the lack of business, a waiter came over to seat us. He tried to show us to a table, but Andrew said, “Oh, no, thank you. We'll be sitting down here.”

He strolled over to the couch and at first I thought he wanted us to sit there, but then he grabbed two pillows and placed them on the ground a little way away from the tables.

I looked at him, baffled.

“Authenticity,” he said, smiling. He was always smiling.

I, personally, couldn't see how sitting on the floor was authentic.

***

There were many other dates, all very unusual. I was used to dances and movies, but with Andrew I got sunsets and local concerts. Once he took me to a bingo night that his aunt was hosting. Oddly enough, that was the night we first kissed.

I remember so clearly the day of graduation, the day I realized that Andrew and I wouldn't always be together. After we threw our hats and got our diplomas, he found me.

“End of high school, huh?” he said.

“Yeah.”

“What do you want to do, Emily?”

“With my life?”

“Sure.”

“Be with you.”

He didn't smile like I wanted him to.

“Don't you want to go to college?”

I sighed. “Want to, or have to?”

Now he smiled. “You choose.”

“I should. Go to college, I mean. I found one that'll accept me.”

There was a long pause before I said, “Andrew, what about you?”

“What about me?”

“What are you gonna do?”

“I dunno. Do what I do best, I guess. Play my music.”

“Oh. Yeah. That's cool. See you later?”

“When would I see you?”

“I see what you mean.”

“Bye, Emily.”

“Bye.”

Thinking back, I wish I had said something better than bye. I wish I had told him that I loved him more than words could describe and that when he sang to me I felt like I was all that mattered in the world. I wanted to tell him that if he had just asked, I wouldn't have gone to college. I would have played his music with him.

I'm sitting at my computer right now, looking at a name on the screen on a website called “peoplefinder.” I want to call him and hear his voice, but I'm afraid. I'm afraid that he won't be my same Andrew.

I get a glass of cold water and sit on my couch. I picture myself having one last conversation with him.

Me: “Hey, Andrew.” (I say it so casually, just like old times.)

Andrew: “Hey, Emily.”

Me: “Why are you wearing a tie?”

Andrew: “Why shouldn't I be?”

Me: “I don't know.”

Andrew: “I have a job.”

Me: “Good.”

Andrew: “I'm a lawyer, Emily.”

Me: “That's great.”

Andrew: “You don't sound like that's great.”

Me: “Don't I?”

Andrew: “I live in an apartment in the city. I talk on the phone with other businesspeople.”

Me: “I'm proud of you.”

Andrew: “I have a diploma hanging up on the wall of my office. My office.”

Me: “Do you play music anymore, Andrew?”

Andrew: “Music.”

He looks at me as if he doesn't remember the word.

Andrew: “No, I don't play my music anymore.”

Me: “Oh.”

Me: “I loved you, Andrew.”

Andrew: “Loved? Past tense?”

Me: “I think so.”

Andrew: “I love you.”

Me: “Why'd you ask me out?”

Andrew: “I thought you were beautiful and smart, and I loved how shiny your dark brown hair was. I liked how you weren't too loud, and you didn't wear low-cut shirts like most other girls.”

Me: “I wish you'd said, ‘Because I felt like it.'”

Andrew: “Sorry.”

Me: “Me too.”

Andrew: “I have to be going.”

Me: “Yeah.”

Me: “Wait!”

Andrew: “Yes?”

Me: “I'd never had Chinese food before.”



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JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 542 comments.


on Mar. 9 2011 at 12:24 pm
skyblue95 PLATINUM, Bear, Delaware
35 articles 1 photo 40 comments

Favorite Quote:
I am paraphrasing, of course. "My only fear is that when they are turned to loving they will find we are turned to hating." -Reverand Msimangu, Cry, The Beloved Country (a book by Alan Paton)

This was AMAZING! It really describes the feeling I think people feel when they realize that high school won't last forever. Sometimes you have to let things go in order to move on with your life. Wow... This was super good. If you could, could you check out some of my stuff? Thank you, and keep writing!

on Mar. 9 2011 at 11:18 am
I LOVED how Emily and Andrew kissed eachother for the first time at Andrew's Aunt's Bingo place!!!!! IT IS SOOOO SWEET!!!!!!

on Mar. 9 2011 at 11:04 am
I LUV THIS!!!!! It is the best i ever read!!!!!!!

on Mar. 9 2011 at 11:01 am
good luck!!!!!! :)

on Mar. 9 2011 at 10:16 am
inksplatters21 SILVER, Mason, Ohio
6 articles 0 photos 84 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Character is how you live when no one is watching."

This is absolutely heartbreaking.  Pleasepleaseplease write a sequel.  Like, I really want to know what happens.  Normally I hate cheesy endings but I want them to be togther!!

on Mar. 9 2011 at 3:56 am
Love-is-painful BRONZE, Phoenix, Arizona
4 articles 0 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
Live what you do, do what you love, Broken hearts hurt worse than broken bones

This was so good i sort of cryed.. You could/ should right a whole magazine i bet you could do. Your an awesome writter!

on Mar. 5 2011 at 11:40 am
Tiannasquigglescake, Myrtle Creek, Oregon
0 articles 0 photos 3 comments
So sad, and so wonderful all in one piece.

Chimzzy BRONZE said...
on Mar. 1 2011 at 1:40 pm
Chimzzy BRONZE, Winnipeg, Other
2 articles 33 photos 16 comments
I cried, it was that good.!

on Feb. 24 2011 at 9:31 pm
OriginalCarbonation GOLD, Naperville, Illinois
11 articles 0 photos 102 comments

Favorite Quote:
dream as if you'll live forever
live as if you'll die tomorrow

thats exactly what i was thinking of! bittersweet dark chocolate.

i love this so incredibly much!


on Feb. 19 2011 at 11:52 am
blackrabbit GOLD, Norfolk, Virginia
15 articles 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Let it Go"

that was absolutely astonishing!

on Feb. 16 2011 at 6:55 pm
Authorgal98 GOLD, Frankort, Illinois
17 articles 0 photos 194 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Let your mind sart a journey through a strange new world..."

I'm crying! This is so sad, but so cute. Bittersweet, dark chocolate story. You could be a full-time writer. You should be!

on Feb. 15 2011 at 7:43 pm
TheMalfunctioningWallflower BRONZE, Houston, Texas
1 article 0 photos 45 comments

Favorite Quote:
"GET THE CAT!!!"

"I did wood paneling."

"Do not FEAR the Crooked Zipper!! EMBRACE the Crooked Zipper!!!"

"What's better than infinity?"

"Wear your helmets, we'll be reaching speeds of three!"

"You could walk on your hands and catch up to him!"

I have read this so many times and each time I want to cry. I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

on Feb. 15 2011 at 7:20 pm
AbigailElizabeth SILVER, Medina, Minnesota
8 articles 0 photos 79 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Scars are souvenirs you never lose" - Goo Goo Dolls

"My name is Emily Brown and his was Andrew Rivers and I loved him."

I honestly got chills reading this. So touching..never stop writing(:


on Feb. 15 2011 at 6:12 pm
TheAurorasFall PLATINUM, Dover, Pennsylvania
29 articles 0 photos 30 comments

Favorite Quote:
life isn't about the number of moments you take to breathe, but about the number of moments that take your breathe away.

wow                                       

on Feb. 15 2011 at 5:35 pm
Ariel_Rosario BRONZE, Port Saint Lucie, Florida
1 article 0 photos 19 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Be yourself, everyone else is already taken" -Oscar Wilde

***Movie lol

on Feb. 15 2011 at 5:35 pm
Ariel_Rosario BRONZE, Port Saint Lucie, Florida
1 article 0 photos 19 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Be yourself, everyone else is already taken" -Oscar Wilde

Aww. You're an amazing writer :) I loved the story. I felt all the emotion! I can see this being a move <3

KEEP WRITING


on Feb. 15 2011 at 4:59 pm
musicprincess PLATINUM, Braselton, Georgia
23 articles 0 photos 84 comments

Favorite Quote:
They say that love is forever, your forever is all that I need

That was amazingly awesome! It's one of those stories that just speaks to you :)

on Feb. 15 2011 at 3:36 pm
AthenaBook SILVER, Arlington, Virginia
5 articles 0 photos 36 comments

Favorite Quote:
You should not live the way the world asks, but the way that you ask of yourself.

That was beautiful! Very meaningful.... I LOVED IT!!!!

Kyraa SILVER said...
on Feb. 15 2011 at 12:58 am
Kyraa SILVER, Iwakuni, Other
5 articles 0 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
The pain of being alone...is not an easy one to bear..why is it...that I can understand your pain?

... teardrops*sniffle* wow that was so BEAUTIFUL!

on Feb. 10 2011 at 3:17 pm
AYO_itsdeja BRONZE, Las Vegas, Nevada
1 article 0 photos 6 comments

*WOW . I'm at a loss for words . This was very well written ; it was so relatable .

I loved it <3 KEEP WRITING .. PLEASE ! lol .