It was a cold cloudy day in north detroit I was waiting for my family. There was a my Dad who had just lost his job and there was my sister who was 7 years old and was mad about us leaving. My mom wasn’t with us she left us when thing were getting tough. I don't know where she is now she left when I was about 10 that was 6 years ago. At times I wonder if she could have stayed thing would have been different but I don't want to think about her, I don't care where or how she is. If I would have known that she would leave us and that all those times she told us “She was going to be with us forever” were lies then I would have never bothered trying to get to know her. I would have ask for her to leave right away . I thought that my mom was alway going to be there for us but she left for no reason really, that is something I would have change if I know that. But for now we have nowhere to sleep and are moving to the poorest city in the U.S. flint michigan. We were supposed to leave early in the morning it's now 8:00 pm we will probably find a bench to sleep on. Falling asleep it was so hard , so hard to do, but once I did it would be amazing. I tossed and turned, but not matter which way I lay, the concrete underneath me still hurt my bones and scratched my skins. I wished I was lucky like some of the homeless, they had mattresses, some of the really lucky ones got to sleep in homeless shelters, a cold wind blew past me, the holes in my clothes trapping in the ice-cold air. I curled into a tight ball and shivered. I didn't have the money for a new jacket, and I wasn't strong enough to steal one. I didn't want to, I never stole, no matter what. I had in the past, it had always made me feel bad. I wanted some nice new things of my own, something I can say I own. The day I buy a new jacket will probably be the happiest day of my life, but that day was far from today. My stomach grumbled reminding me of my empty stomach.It was so empty it hurt, the pain unbearable, making me feel weak.I hadn't eaten in weeks. There once was a time where I wasn’t worrying about if I was going to eat or not. Once long ago My mom would buy a small personal pizza for my sister on special days, like when one of us would come home for school with a certificate on most improved or something dumb like that. Even though it was only like $2, she couldn’t afford anything for herself so she would eat his leftover crust. She told me she would always tell her “Mommy are you hungry? Go buy one just for you” and she would just say “No I’m not hungry, I only want a little snack” She only just told me this a few years ago and I was shocked because by the time I came along my dad had gotten a good job and I thought we were going to live just like anyone else. I once had a job. When I was about 12 years a couple of friends of mine were selling drugs that they would get for a group of gang members. At the time I knew what I was doing, was wrong but I knew that I had to do. I had to get money of my own, my dad was struggling to provide food for us I had to get food for myself that is something that I learned early. I wanted to leave to stop dealing but I couldn’t. How could I leave that? I was able to pay for stuff that my dad couldn’t ford at the time. Like school supplies and shoes that weren’t from the thrift store. As soon as he found out where I was getting all me money. He made me stop and explain to me that I was killing my own people.The next day I went down to tell the gang. They weren’t happy. But they understood.The last thing that I know that helped me realized how poor we were was that school systems do free lunches for kids under 18 during the summer. When I was a kid I remember my dad taking us to get lunch at the school then go play disc golf, soccer, or do something else free and fun, it was a blast and I had no clue it was because we were poor.There is many thing that I wounder in my life like If one day I would be like one of those rich people that was once poor but know they are successful know and everyone stat=rts to care about them unlike when they were poor no one cared. The most people cared about poor is how could we avoid them, or think how to tell us that they don't got no spare change. If you notice that is one of the most important problems in american that we have, that no one cares about poor instead of trying to help us out they make thing worst by having cops remove us from what they consider bench but to the other person that bench could be there home. But as long as the people that have money or at least enough to be okay then they would care.
October 29, 2017