Please come in to class on time, if we have to be here so do you; warn the class beforehand if your handwriting is chicken scratch; it’s only polite; speak at a decent pace, because your students are the ones who have tests at the end of the quarter; don’t be too boring; have fun; don’t have too much fun; don’t be a pushover; don’t issue too much homework; actually don’t issue homework at all; grade fairly; always keep pens and pencils somewhere in the class; have a pencil sharpener that works; don’t expect your students to keep anything you give them if it doesn’t have holes; keep a hole puncher in the class; please don’t crack jokes if you are not funny; but how will I know if I’m not funny?; delayed laughter equals not funny; limit stories of your ‘super cute’ children to once or twice a week; never more than once during a class period; limit conversations with other teachers that aren’t even in the classroom; no one cares how good of friends you guys are outside of school; be organized; don’t lose any essays; always have an agenda for the class period; scatterbrain teachers are exasperating; I know that I can go to the bathroom, so let’s not do the irritating song and dance of: “It’s may I go to the bathroom”; When playing a video, don’t leave the cursor right in the middle of the screen; don’t teach a topic as if everyone has already learned it; it’s called a break for a reason, so don’t expect your students to submit anything that shows they tried; if there is a spot in a test where you messed up, make that clear before class, not in the middle when everyone is already working; be kind; be decent; don’t always expect class participation; don’t take it too personally if only three or so people participate during a class; avoid being too friendly; you’re still a teacher; minor infractions coming from a student, do not need to be dealt with during class; we’re teenagers, so you might as well accept that a lot of the things we hand in will be late; don’t ramble; stay on topic; don’t use the slang words your students are using; but if you do, make sure it’s funny; how will I know if it’s funny?; delayed laughter equals not funny; don’t complain about how tired you are; don’t complain about your kids; don’t complain about how much work you have; it’s 2014, if you don’t know how to use a computer for video or movies, just don’t; always make sure you leave a decent substitute when you are absent; lighten up, and be positive; no one cares about what you had for breakfast, or what ‘cool’ interesting thing has happened in your life; if it is irrelevant, it’s better to just not say anything at all; it’s eight o’clock in the morning, why are you so loud?; make sure your students are engaged throughout the lesson; teenagers can be the worst, so stand your ground, and be tough if you need to; use your authority reasonably; I don’t want a graded paper from three months ago, so grade papers on time; standing over a student’s shoulder while they’re taking a test is incredibly intimidating and awkward; don’t do that; don’t be monotone; don’t eat your four-course lunch in class; don’t hold your students over the bell; you had your forty-five minutes, and now it’s over; don’t pick favorites; don’t make it obvious if you do; don’t be too interested in the personal lives of your students; that’s just weird; teach well; you were a teen once too, understand where your students are coming from; all we want is to be understood; that’s all?; that’s all.