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Walk Away

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I am a baby born on a warm winter night as the clock strikes twelve.

I make my first feeble cries of beginning as my eyes open and take in the world around me. Hands cradle my tiny body and sounds that I cannot understand make themselves evident in the universe. A red, sticky substance is wiped from my skin and I am glad to be rid of it, for the smell is strange and unwelcoming to my nose. Something wraps a blanket around me and I am grateful for the comforting warmth it provides. I feel my body being moved and can only watch as I am passed from one set of arms to another. A soft gaze stares down at me as a finger traces my features and although I cannot state the reason, safety radiates throughout the fibers of my being and I settle into a content frame of mind.

I felt it.

I am a child sitting in a field of suns on green stems.

The wind blows its course through my hair of three Fates' threads, spilling it out past my shoulders and along my back. My legs are crossed beneath me and my arms are dangling loosely at my sides like fishing lures that haven't gotten a bite. Blue sky reflects on my face and oak leave eyes like light reflects a rainbow through a piece of glass. Colors fly through the charged atmosphere and bounce off the trees at the edge of the golden field, eventually returning to the fixed point at the center of the ellipse. I slowly breathe a deep gust of air that is filled with illuminating particles into my lungs. I don't look to see if my chest is glowing, for I'm already sure of it, just as I am sure that my heart is pumping life through my veins. Tension in my shoulders relaxes and the songs of nature fill my unbarred, unbiased ears.

I heard it.

I am a student walking the narrow path of academics.

I avert my gaze from the questioning, demanding eyes of my peers and instead stare at the ground, where nothing threatening lurks. My hands run themselves through the straight milk chocolate hair that sits atop of my head and nervously pull at it. I walk into a classroom and find my seat, shifting uncomfortably on the hard blue plastic as shadow figures stalk in and shut the door. Black walls replace the looking glass and all light ceases to exist. I swallow back bile that rises in my throat and pull out my white binder with my equations to life that reside in it. Dust flows through the air I inhale and I cannot help but cough to attempt to expel it from my body. Mists of perfumes and flecks of makeup lurch their way toward me and I wish desperately for a gas mask to help keep them at bay. I struggle to ignore the materials and focus on my forte while the shadow figures act out darkness on the stage in front of me. I hum the songs of the past to myself and tune out the rest of the world, solace finally finding me. The hand of a shadow rips it away along with my equations and I don't even attempt to grab them back, for I already know their future. The shadow looks at them, then at me, and with a sadistic smile, rips them apart. I don't say anything, merely kneel down and gather the shattered pieces of my soul together so I can glue them as I have done before.

I learned it.

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