i look down at the jagged rocks below me, the wind pushing on my back, threatening to drag me over the edge. it seams that i always end up here, even though i promised myself i would never come back. this is the place where it happened, the place where i lost my little sister. it seams as if it has been forever since i have seen her smile and heard her laugh. she had laughed that very day that she fell over the edge. i always thought i would be the first to go, or that i would die shortly after she did. it has been 5 years, and every day without my little sun lighting up my life has been torture. i believed that when she would die, the world couldn't possibly continue without her, that it would explode or spontaneously combust as soon as her light went out. it didn't and I'm still breathing. i just wish the wind would take me far away, over the edge and into the darkness, mabey there i will find my sun.
March 1, 2012