A beautiful Life Revised

I’ve made a lot mistakes in my life. I’ve said and done things I’d give anything to take back. I’ve hurt and pushed away the people who I loved the most. I quit things that I shouldn’t have, and won games I should have never played. I’ve done what I thought was right only to discover I made the wrong choice because I was so blinded by my own selfish reasons. I’ve been given plenty of second chances, some I deserved, and some I didn’t. I’ve picked fights, broken promises, and lost important people over childish feuds. I’ve cried tears that I never thought would end , tears that as they hit the ground, felt as if my heart was breaking more and more with every drop but looking back now, I believe in the end all of this somehow led me here, right where I’m supposed to be.

And throughout my journey I’ve done amazing things, ordinary to many, but extraordinary to me. I’ve felt the sun upon my face one last time before it finally set. I’ve held a new born baby girl and pulled her close to my skin, comforting her before she started a journey in this scary and beautiful world. I’ve loved with all my heart, and I gave all I could until there was nothing left to give. I’ve ran in the pouring rain, and it felt like freedom on my skin. I’ve met incredible people, and I can only hope I touched their hearts as much as they touched mine. I’ve laughed like there was no tomorrow, and in that simple moment nothing else mattered.

I realize a little too late that I’ve seen a small part of this world angle by angle, seeing it for all the beauty it held, and I took every bit of it for granted. Until now, and even though my life was just as normal as anyone else’s, it was extraordinary just simply, because I got to live it. So as I leave this place I remember the simple things that didn’t seem important back then like the gentle touch of my mother that soothed me all those years of childhood, the smell of my grandfather: dull smoke and after shave, or the laughter of my brother a melody that will soon fade I’ll miss these the most. More than the money, and the goals none of that matters anymore. This perfect person I’ve tried so hard to be, someone who always knows what to do and who to be doesn’t matter. I realize now that I’ve found peace in every corner, and every broken bridge I came across I somehow was able to cross. And as I take my last breathes tears are swelling in my eyes because I have no more time and I’m going to miss all of this so much . But then all of a sudden I feel a rush of calmness come over me like a wave, and as I take my last breathe. I discover it’s really nothing I should have ever feared because I realize now I’m finally coming home.





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