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The Miracle That Is Noah.
”Don’t leave me; don’t you dare leave me.“ I sobbed as I ran to keep up with the gurney. ”I need you…“ I squeezed his hand as I talked, ”I need you…“
His eyes flickered open, unfocused and pained. ”I need you too.“ A small smile flashed across his face before it turned a grimace and his eyes closed again.
”Noah? Noah!“ Suddenly, I was pushed aside as more doctors and nurses elbowed their way through. ”Noah…“
Then they disappeared through some double doors, I tried to follow but someone held me back. No.
Tears ran down my face. If he died, a part of would die too. If he died, it would all be my fault. If he died…
Carefully, someone guided me to a chair and, as I rocked myself slowly back and forth, my mind tried to make sense of this mess.
Noah had protected me. He’d taken every punch, every kick and jab in my place; shielding me. Noah hadn’t just saved my life either but had unknowingly saved another, I touched my belly at the thought, but now I couldn’t save him.
If only I’d kept my secrets to myself.
Tense minutes turned into long drawn out hours.
The same word danced around my head, chased by another, altogether more sinister word.
The two seemed shackled somehow; joined together for eternity.
Those shackled should be around a murder’s wrists, I half snarled in my head. The same murderer that had managed to orchestrate it all from behind bars twenty miles away.
He wanted me gone; without a witness there was no case against him, he’d walk free from prison. My ’accident‘ would grant him freedom.
He hadn’t counted on Noah.
Oh God, Noah…
I couldn’t get the memory out of my head; threats, screams, thuds and yells echoed in my ears.
I burst into tears once more, cradling my stomach; the bump hardly visible under my oversized sweater. Our child may never see its daddy; my last memory of him would be one of gore and horror. Pregnant and alone, I sat, waiting.
Time ticked by.
Wiping my eyes of tears, I looked up. ”Yes?“ I sniffed, my heart in my mouth. He’s gone, I thought. He’s… dead.
The policemen towered over me. ”We’d like to have a chat about the events of tonight, if we may?“
I cast a sideways glance at the double doors and nodded.
* * * * *
I sat curled up on a chair in the far corner of the room, my knees under my chin. I could barely look at him; I knew it was my fault. Every broken bone, bruise and scar would have been mine to bear, had he not stepped in. I stared at the limp and broken body that lay on the bed in front of me. That wasn’t Noah. It was someone that looked like him. I don’t know why but my mind would not accept that the young man lying there was Noah.
It was just an empty shell. Would it be like this forever? Would I ever look at him the same way? Or would I always see this in my head?
The tears were becoming annoying now, constantly flowing down my cheeks. Not once did Noah shed a tear whilst they beat him, he took it all in relative silence.
That’s what had scared me the most, but not as much as the thought of him never waking up.
By now the whole hospital new about our predicament, after the police had told the nurses about the baby and they had demanded I have a scan.
”Mummy and baby are fine, just a little shaken I think.“ That line set me spiralling. I just broke down again, I screamed at them; I actually screamed.
”But Daddy’s not, is he?“
No, Daddy’s not fine at all. Daddy’s fighting for his life; Daddy may never get to see you open your eyes for the first time. Daddy might… Daddy might die.
They just left me too it, sat screaming, agonising over what to say to my child when they asked where their Daddy was, if things all went wrong.
If he died without knowing what he had to live for, what kind of girlfriend would I be?
I had to tell him, conscious or not.
From the moment I promised myself I would tell him, we never had a moment alone together. I just wanted it to be him, the baby and me. We weren’t going to get that though, his condition was worsening day-by-day, doctors and nurses never left his side. The chance of an intimate moment was slipping away.
It had been two weeks now, two weeks since I made that promise. I had to do it today; so much had happened. The thugs had been arrested, found after they’d been bragging to their friends about the little hero they’d dragged of his pedestal. They weren’t so pleased with themselves now; they were going to rot in jail.
The hospital staff were starting to lose patience too. They were starting to imply I should let him go, twice he’d left us already, both times they’d brought him back, but I couldn’t let him go without giving him a fighting chance. This might give him the kick he needed to get better. This had to work.
”Excuse me?“ I whispered to the nurse as the busied herself with something or another.
”Can I have a minute alone, please? With him, I mean“ I saw the worry on her face. ”Just a minute, please. This is really important.“
”Okay, but that’s all I can allow. If anything happens you must come and get me.“
I nodded and, as she left, shuffled closer to the bed. I stroked his hand gently, missing the way he did the same to me. I tried to hold back the tears; I had a job to do. Maybe this would make a difference, they do say talking to coma patients can help them recover or something like that. I might have made it up, just to convince myself I was finally doing some good.
”Hey Noah, it’s me. You know who I am right? Yeah, that’s it. Well, I’ve got some big news for you. Guess what? You’re gonna be a dad.“ I chewed my lip nervously, I felt stupid talking to someone that simply couldn’t talk back. ”Yeah, in a couple of months you’re gonna have another person to love. I’m going to have to share you aren’t I? I feel really bad leaving it so long but there has never been a good time to tell you, this isn’t really what I would call ideal either but we work with what we’re given. This baby is going to be so lucky, having you for a dad, but it needs to know how lucky it is first hand, not just from me. You’ve got to fight this, please. You and me and this baby, that’s all I want. Us as a family… please.“
I lay my hand on his, careful not to dislodge any of the wires or tubes. Maybe I should let him go, this was no way to live. My eyes closed, my plea was over, that was all I could do; that and pray, but what use is praying when this was the work of the Devil?
We sat like that for a while, holding hands like we had before this hell began and me. The nurse slipped back in, I could hear the door open and her shoes squeak on the strange hospital flooring. She didn’t disturb us; I think she knew what I was turning over in my head, leaving me alone to my decision. This was something I needed to do for myself.
My eyes snapped open. ”What?“
The nurse turned toward us. ”Sorry dear?“
”You said something didn’t you? I heard someone say something…“
”No dear, it wasn’t me.“ she walked over to me and patted my shoulder. ”It might be the stress, it’s not good for the baby dear, and maybe you should think about-“
I hushed her. ”There it is again.“ I stared at Noah. ”Noah, can you hear me?“
His lips parted and grunted.
My heart soared. ”Noah, Noah, please try and wake up, for me, for your baby, please.“
His eyes flickered open. ”You’re pregnant?“ he smiled faintly. ”I’m going to be a daddy, eh?“
I laughed. ”Only you Noah, only you.“ The miracle that is Noah, my Noah. The Noah that wouldn’t let me down in a million years; the Noah that lived to please. The Noah I loved so much.
The nurse gasped and ran from the room screaming. ”Doctor Smithe, come quickly! Doctor Smithe to Room 102!“
”What’s her problem?“ Noah chuckled weakly.
I beamed, for the first time in weeks I knew everything was going to be okay. Noah was back and we were going to be a family.
I leant over, careful not to hit my bump, and kissed him. Finally, our lips met, after weeks of longing for this moment I had to make it perfect.
He lifted his hand to my neck and it rested where it always did. ”Hey, where’s your guardian angel?“
I smiled. ”He’s lying right in front of me.“ And I kissed him again.