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I'm Perfect This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine.

I’m perfect.

Do you see, do you see how perfect I am?
Do you see how perfectly I fix my face to look lovely?
Do you see how perfectly I do my hair to look so soft and beautiful?
Do you see how perfectly I act?

Everything about me is perfect, I know you think it.
It’s in your eyes when you look at me while I walk down the halls.

You stare at the people who are vying for my attention, and you think I’m just perfect as you mouth the words;
“God, I hate her.”

And so I tell myself, every day, just how perfect I am.
When I wake up in the morning, I think of how perfectly I must have looked while I slept.
When I shower I look down and admire just how perfectly I’m shaped.
When I fix my perfect hair and do my perfect make-up, I tell myself just how perfect I truly I am.

And when I walk into the kitchen and see him leaning against the counter,
When I smile and choke down the newest ­flavor of bile that rises in my throat, I still know I’m perfect.
When I don’t bother to ask his name because I know he’ll be gone before I get home, I know I’m perfect.
When he leers at me and agrees with how perfect I am, I know how perfect I am.

And when I walk out the door.
And when I reach the bus stop.
And when I greet everyone with a hug.
And every time I breathe.
Every time I know just how f---ing perfect I am.

So perfect I could scream.
So perfect …
I feel full of perfection, full and round like a balloon,
Stretched so tight with perfection I just might pop and all my perfection wouldn’t make any difference.
That’s how f----ing perfect I feel!

Ah, but it’s okay. Because no matter how tight it stretches me, no matter how painful it is, I’m still perfect.
I still look perfect.
I still act perfect.
And I still feel perfectly vile residing within this skin.
But that’s not at all how I should feel.

No, no, no.
Perfect. I should feel … perfect.
And so I’ll tell myself; smile perfectly, dress perfectly.
Because I’m supposed to be f---ing perfect.

Because when I curl up at night and laugh and laugh just to hold back my tears, I’m still perfect.
Even when my face crumples and turns red and ugly, I know I’m perfect.
Because when you add the right details, when you fake the right things, add just enough empty space,
It makes you perfect.

All it takes is the right punctuation.
All it takes is the right spaces and spelling.
A little capitalization and it’s perfect.
I’m perfect.

I’m perfect.
I’mperfect.
Imperfect.

… I guess I lied.

This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. This piece has been published in Teen Ink’s monthly print magazine.




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This article has 32 comments. Post your own!

Kelly Lynn said...
May 8 at 7:17 pm:
Let me begin by stating how much I love this.  A newspaper colleage of mine gave me an issue of Teen Ink a few years ago to look at.  I read through it, and settled on this story, of which I was instantly captured. Being a writer myself, I felt such a strong connection with the young author. You see, I had wrote a song in which the ending is almost exactly the same. Great minds think alike. I have since then wanted to be able to meet the artist of this inspiring, candid story. ... (more »)
 
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TheJustThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jul. 20, 2012 at 6:24 pm:
This sounds like a song the old Avril Lavigne would have sang.
 
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KestrelThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jun. 6, 2012 at 4:24 pm:
OH MY GOD. This is so cool. Reminds me of an Audrey Hepburn quote..."Nothing is impossible...the word itself says 'I'm possible!'"
 
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followingnofootsteps said...
May 29, 2012 at 2:38 am:
This is amazing. I hung onto every last word. The piece was beautiful and eloquent. 
 
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LinsT said...
May 1, 2012 at 2:49 pm:
This was really cool. I love the ending  (:
 
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wishingtheskywasbluer This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Apr. 28, 2012 at 6:25 pm:
this is so incredibly well written . . . just . . . wow. you are an amazing writer.
 
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zebrastripe13This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Apr. 15, 2012 at 6:35 pm:
i love this so much!! nice job
 
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ilovejuliansmith said...
Jan. 1, 2012 at 7:09 pm:
this was amazing! i loved the ending! :) please keep writing!
 
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DreamyNightmareThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Dec. 5, 2011 at 8:32 pm:
I love this! The ending where you wrote I'm perfect, I'mperfect, and Imperfect. That was very clever. 
 
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jasont727 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Sept. 30, 2011 at 7:36 pm:
Wow! The play on words at the end was really brilliant and clever. Thank you!
 
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LaceeJade This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Sept. 25, 2011 at 8:40 pm:
This Is Absolutly The Best Article I Have Read!!! Its Amazzing! i Love It!
 
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RiverSong said...
Aug. 30, 2011 at 9:13 pm:

I love this! The ending was really intriguing.  I think it would be even more powerful if you took out the "I guess I lied" and just let the "I'm perfect / I'mperfect / Imperfect" speak for itself.

5/5

 
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Kgirl This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Aug. 17, 2011 at 12:44 am:
Incredible!
 
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Alon_Freevoice said...
Jul. 26, 2011 at 4:57 am:
This piece is perfect! I love, love, love it! :)))
 
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lovetildeath said...
Jul. 4, 2011 at 4:08 am:
It was a very realistic piece of work it went from being perfect to normal flawed people I liked it.
 
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Sunset_on_tomorrow said...
Jun. 13, 2011 at 4:58 pm:
This is so beautiful... short and sweet. Too many authors make their pieces too long, but this is the... well, perfet length!
 
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PJD17 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
May 5, 2011 at 8:36 pm:
wow  i just read it again  i truly cant believe how good this is   there are very few stories on this website that i wish i wrote but this is most certainly one of them
 
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Smurfy_Liebe said...
Apr. 29, 2011 at 9:05 pm:
This is...perfect!! No but seriously, it's amazing and I really wish I can put such waves of emotion within my writing like you did here. This piece goes from having no emotion of the author to showing the reality of everyday people- who they are behind closed doors can be completely opposite of who they desperately attempt to be. I'm not sure if that makes sense, but this is so powerful, and you are such an amazing writer for being able to come up with this <3
 
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PJD17 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Mar. 16, 2011 at 6:30 pm:
That was outstanding
 
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CoughingColours said...
Dec. 28, 2010 at 9:47 pm:
Oh my goodness. When I first read this I almost cried. I absolutely love this! I like how the emotion grows more frantic as she explains. Truly amazing
 
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