I first saw her in the self-help section. The glossy covers swallowed the fluorescent light but smiled, still allowing the glow to show through the teeth. I took a few tentative steps toward her and tried to watch her discreetly. Ironically, she looked completely lost.

Her green eyes flitted from cover to cover, her gaze scrolling along the bindings of every “For Dummies” book. She whined, hopping in place like a toddler with a full bladder. I couldn't contain my curiosity anymore. I felt it eating at my rib cage, demanding to know what she was doing.

“What exactly are you looking for?” I asked, peering over her shoulder. She did not jump, nor did she look at me. She continued to nibble nervously at her fingernails, scanning the books. I had to crane my neck to see around her massively messy hurricane of a hairdo.

“The ‘L' section,” came the answer. Her murmur sounded more like a distant wave, solitary and far away. I mentally generated a list of self-help books that could be located in the “L” section. Lacrosse for Dummies, Laminating for Dummies-

“Life for Dummies.” Her meek voice interrupted my thoughts. Startled, I watched her scanning the books.

“You don't look like a dummy.”

The girl dropped to her knees, squinting at the large font on the books. “Well,” she started, her voice a sarcastic whisper, “I'm glad my Looking Smart for Dummies wasn't a waste of money.” Scanning the books. I noticed that however many times her eyes darted back and forth across the shelves, she never touched any of the books. Her fingernails, all ten now, rested in between her teeth.

“Did you know that even though they were written by different people, the For Dummies books are always in alphabetical order?”

I shook my head. She could not see me. She mumbled something incoherent to herself that sounded like a garble of questions and complaints.

She dropped her hand and began fervently tapping her thigh. I asked why she needed a Life for Dummies book. To which she readily replied, “I suffer from CDO.”

“Don't you mean OCD?” I asked.

“Yes, but CDO is in alphabetical order.” She turned, looking at me for the first time. I had the sudden urge to leave. “The way it should be.”

And I could do nothing but fall to my knees and help her look for Life.