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letter for a first love

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Dear James,

I sat down one night and wrote you a letter to tell you how much you mattered. It took all night and most of the early morning too, but when the sun rose up I scrawled my name on the bottom of the page, through. Twenty two pages front and back. That’s how much you mean to me. It was streaked with tears and warmed with kisses, but it wasn’t meant for you to see. I stuck that letter in the biggest envelope known to man then ran outside to put it in the mail box. Thunder struck and lightening cracked through the sky, I jumped nearly ten feet high. Then the rain came down, but I didn’t run away. I thought of when we were jumping in puddles, little kids at play. I let that rain soak me to the bone, and opened your letter to the sky. I poured my heart into those pages but their contents chased over my skin and was soaked up into the damp earth. Letting go didn’t mean giving up on us, it meant accepting forever wasn't meant to be. I’m not sorry I loved you, I’m not sorry it’s over, and you know what James? All those words that made up my love for you grew into a hundred flowers that make me think of you, my oldest friend, in the nicest way.

All my love,


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