The Forest: Snapper Time

September 7, 2009
“I already told you that there’s no way that turtle is gonna want a skateboard for his two hundredth birthday!” Kyle the black footed ferret said to his friend.


If you don’t know this already, almost all of the characters in this series are animals; I suggest you read the earlier ones first but I won’t ruin your fun.



“Since when do I take birthday advice from the guy who tried getting me a brand new computer” Rocky the skunk responded; they were both at the store looking for a gift for a land tortoise named Mr. Snapper, who had been a role model for them.


“If you love your old computer so much you should just marry the thing….. then your kids would just be little calculators” Kyle stated.





Later that day the party was at a clearing and the band was already performing for the crowd, but they were busy once they were through with that.




“I’ll bet you fifty bucks the badgers show up and wreck this place” Ricky the raccoon said to Rocky.









“Were they not invited or is this about the whole taking away the elderly thing?” Rocky responded; Kyle would have asked what he meant but Mr. Snapper showed up.

He rode in on his awesome skateboard.






“Hey homies; did ya see my new ride?” Mr. Snapper asked with his raspy old voice; he moved ten times faster with the skateboard.





“I thought you didn’t want high speed internet before so I decided to get you DSL, but then those guys called me a specist” Kyle stated.





“Since when does anyone not like speed? You need to keep up with the times, now watch this old fool do a kick flip” the tortoise said before riding off.



“I wonder if in his day things sucked just as much as they do now? Oh well, at least everyone is enjoying the party” Chatter the brown tree squirrel stated as he quickly dashed over to where the rest of the band was.

Then badgers came out of nowhere and started tearing the place apart.


“Nice going….. you jinxed it” Ricky commented; everyone saw the relentless creatures attacking but nobody knew that they were after the tortoise.



“Did the narrator just say they’re after Snapper?” Ricky asked; evidently they can hear me.











“Didn’t I already mention that the badgers come to take away the elderly for natural selection’s sake?” Rocky asked.







“Come with us Snapper; it is time for you to move into our residential burrow. If you hurry you can enjoy meat loaf night” a badger said.





“You’ll never take me alive” Mr. Snapper responded just before he tried running off; he got about two inches in two minutes before a badger cut him off.



“Come on guys, he’s our burden and we want to take care of him” Ricky stated.

“You should work toward different stuff with your time while this old turtle can enjoy a time of relaxation” another badger said.






“I don’t wanna relax….. I want babes who like skateboarding cartoons; I want freedom and possibly cake….. unless it’s almond or carrot” Mr. Snapper responded.

“Chatter, find him another cake now” Ricky whispered.




“Sorry, but you don’t make the rules here; you can barley afford to take of him anyway” a badger commented.








“You don’t make the rules either….. and if you come any closer I’ll show you why people don’t mess with wild animals” Ricky warned.





“You’re mauling powers will not affect us all” a badger stated before he and the others attacked.










“Cartoon fight!” everyone shouted.







A badger charged at Ricky but he back flipped and landed on another badger that was waiting behind him; when the charging badger got to Ricky the raccoon just kicked him in the face and leapt over him once he fell to the ground.




Ricky ducked as a badger swung its arm and nearly took him out; then he spun around on the ground and tripped the badger. One last badger came out and pointed a loaded gun to Ricky’s head.









“Snapper is going with us to do nothing..... got it?” the badger said as the others got up.












But then another gun was pressed up against the head of the armed badger; everyone looked and saw Ike….. the gangsta beaver everyone knew.



“Everybody stand down! This party has now officially begun; nobody’s gonna leave and we all gonna have fun” Ike stated.







“All right Ike!” Chatter commented before he handed out pieces of chocolate cake; that probably wasn’t the best thing for all the woodland creatures because the next day the vet’s office was packed.








Everyone wanted to flip Chatter off for serving them that cake, but they couldn’t because cartoons only have four fingers.





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