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The Forest: Dawn of the Ducks
One bright and sunny day Ricky and Rocky were in a field. Rocky was on his back staring at the sky and Ricky was stepping on berries in a wooden container.
“When the crowd tastes this super incredible jelly all of us will really get the party started” Ricky said as he stepped on the berries bare footed… or bare pawed; you know what I mean.
“Who would have guessed these berries work like Viagra” Rocky added just before he got up.
He then tested his point out by taking a large cupful of the jelly from the container and pouring it on a tree that had fallen down; it immediately stood upward again.
“It’s too bad these are just cartoon berries; otherwise we could sell them for real” Rocky commented.
It was then that the sun suddenly faded and the field became cloaked in a giant shadow; Ricky and Rocky looked up to see a massive swarm made up of the most terrifying minions imaginable… if you haven’t guessed by the title they were all… platypuses, okay fine they were ducks.
“This can only mean one thing” Rocky said with a deep seriousness.
“Either it’s time for the Boston duck tours and we need to get on those boat type things or the Duckulon Empire finally came for us” Ricky responded.
“They’re heading for the mayor’s place” Rocky stated.
“Not if Ricky the raccoon can help it!” Ricky said just before he tore off his shirt, revealing his super hero shirt. It was blue and had a diamond shaped, red and yellow logo with an ‘R’ in it on the front.
“Nice try Ricky, but the only super powers cartoons have are pulling random objects out of thin air and surviving being hit by falling pianos” Rocky admitted.
“Yeah but I still had to have a super hero moment” Ricky stated.
When the two followed the duck swarm they met up with Chatter and Kyle; soon all the animals were forced to see the mayor being dragged out of city hall by a duck with a tall hat.
The mayor was a red haired woman with very pale skin; she was elected after heated debates over things like her species and her policy over interspecies marriage.
Now she was chained up; but not in a kinky way. It’s not like these were kinky ducks… unless they were and nobody noticed; what were their races anyway, I mean are they all one race? Oh wait what if they were Irish ducks; that would just be sooooooooo incredibly awesome.
Wait what was I talking about again?
Anyway the leader of the Duckulon Empire, named Will (Hey, all the super scary names like Duckula or Duckulus Supreme were taken) had taken the mayor and made a loud quacking sound that every animal gathered before him heard. They all screamed and ran around in circles that were more like ovals… maybe even triangles for some of the more insane animals.
Everyone was absolutely terrified by the duck saying that he was taking The Forest; what would happen now that they were part of the empire?
About a week later The Forest had changed dramatically. There were giant, stone statues of ducks set up everywhere along with new laws that made the animals do stuff like keeping bread in every pond at all times; the place was even being patrolled constantly by their army.
But even when the Duckulon Empire changed the way The Forest worked, they gave everyone some cool stuff.
“I can’t believe they gave me a nuclear powered guitar” Rocky said with excitement as he plugged in his new gift.
“I can’t believe it’s not butter… but it is Rocky” Ricky responded as he carefully loaded his new laser gun; it was like the Excalibur of nerdiness.
But Rocky’s television set was on and soon he saw stuff that changed everything; there were bad things happening.
“It’s horrible; they’re killing everyone” a helpless otter shouted from a pond outside as she was being filmed. Ducks were flying around in the background pecking everyone; I don’t mean to sound cruel….. But it was hilarious.
Rocky looked on in terror just before Ike leapt into action and pulled out some guns that he had been carrying with him.
“Everybody stand down” Ike shouted as he raised his weapons.
“Ike don’t!” Rocky begged from his living room, but Ike still shot down dozens and dozens of ducks for the sake of freedom.
“Gangsta beavers will be gangsta beavers” Ricky said with remorse knowing that Ike would probably get it for that.
“Ricky, I can’t do this anymore… those ducks are out of control; I’m gonna head down to the palace and end this” Rocky said.
“You mean you’re gonna kill Will? Won’t he have ninjas or something?” Ricky asked quite hesitantly.
“I don’t care; I’m gonna kill Will” Rocky said as he took out a katana; he already had on a yellow t shirt proving that this reference is solid.
Rocky and Ricky soon met up with Chatter (who was enjoying his new hamster wheel very much before he realized what was really happening) and they all headed down to a palace with giant duck statues everywhere.
“So here’s the plan; since we couldn’t find Kyle we’re gonna have to just run in there and hack away until somebody hits Will” Rocky explained.
“What was the plan with Kyle” Ricky asked.
“The same thing only with a freaking ferret fighting furiously” Rocky responded with a deep emphasis on the alliteration.
“When I’ve said three all of us will head in; one…..” Ricky began.
“Say goodnight mother duckers!” Chatter suddenly shouted in a high pitched voice; he was swinging inside from a rope tied to a spot over the entrance doorway.
He soon let go of the rope and went flying towards a duck; unfortunately for him the duck ducked (yes that was a HUGE pun) and Chatter hit a column.
“Are you okay dude?” Ricky asked from the entrance.
“Thupid idea” Chatter said with his front teeth stuck into the column. All of the ducks including Will saw the intruders.
Suddenly the crowd flew toward Ricky and Rocky; some were sliced by the katana Rocky brought and others were shot down by Ricky’s incredibly awesome laser.
They beat the crowd but it was now that they noticed several more ducks with guns pointed in their direction.
“You’ve lost” Will said. But before he could tell his army to attack an explosion broke a hole through the ceiling.
Once the dust cleared everyone saw Kyle slowly descending with his new jet boots; soon he managed to reach the ground.
“No… you’ve lost little super ducky; you may have thought that you won but I heard the commotion and found some explosives” Kyle said.
“So… where’s your weapon, ferret?” Will asked.
“Uhh… what weapon?” Kyle asked.
It was then that Will kicked him where the sun would not have shown provided that he was a cartoon that wore pants; yes, it was a really low blow.
Kyle fell over and it was then that Rocky seized his chance; he quickly used his cartoon abilities and pulled his nuclear guitar out of
thin air. Then he slammed it into the ground with all his strength.
The explosion sounded and with it came a high ‘D’ note; when the dust cleared the ducks were gone and so was the palace.
“That was incredible” Rocky said; his clothes were ruined by the explosion, but it’s a cartoon so it didn’t destroy everything.
“Where’s Will?” Ricky asked just before a roast duck that looked surprisingly delicious fell to the ground.
“There you go” Rocky said just before he grabbed Chatter by the tail and briefly pulled him out of the column he slammed into.
“My teeth hurt” Chatter said… he was bleeding a little. Yes, cartoons do bleed every now and then.
“Your welcome” Rocky responded.
“Congratulations for saving this place!” The mayor said as she walked to the area with all of the animals behind her.
“Don’t thank all of us; we’re just a band” Kyle said weakly as he got up from the ground.