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The True Story of the Tortoise and the Hare

You’ve heard all of this talk about a tortoise beating a hare in a running race. Well, most of this isn’t true. I am going to tell you the true story of the tortoise and the hare.
Once upon a time there was a hare, who was a professional NASCAR driver. He had won four Nextel Cups, and was always bragging about how fast he could drive. One day he saw the tortoise walking down the street. He said,

“Yo, what’s up T?” Then he started mocking the tortoise for being slow at everything. The tortoise had taken just enough of this mocking and said,

“Who the heck do you think you are?” The hare answered back,
“I am the famous Hairy Hare.”

“That’s a stupid name, who named you, a goat?” the tortoise answered back.
Then the tortoise said, “There is no denying that you are swift, but even you can be beaten!”
Then the hare squealed with laughter and said, “Beaten in a race? By whom? Not you, surely! I bet there is nobody in the world that can win against me. Why don’t you try?Annoyed by such bragging, the tortoise accepted the challenge. A course was planned the next day at noon at the Daytona 500. The tortoise borrowed a race car from a friend who was a professional NASCAR driver.The next day, the tortoise and the hare were waiting at the starting line. When their friend, the frog, said “go”, the hare zoomed off at a great speed, while the tortoise drove slowly off.This was a ten lap race and the hare was already on his fifth lap, so he decided he had plenty of time to take a break, since the tortoise was still on his second lap. The hare drove into the pits and took a nap. When he woke up, the tortoise was at the end of his eighth lap, so the hare zoomed out of the pits and caught up to the tortoise on the ninth lap.The hare yelled at the tortoise,

“Nobody can beat me! Nobody!”

“We’ll see about that”, the tortoise yelled back. After he said that the hare slammed his car right into the tortoise’s.Both cars started to roll onto their sides. All of a sudden the hare’s car smashed into the tortoise’s car again. They both spun out of control. The hare’s car hit the wall, shot up into mid air, and came down onto the grass. The car burst into flames. Pit workers ran to the crash site and extinguished the car. The hare jumped out of the car and started yelling,

“I’m on fire! I’m on fire!” The pit workers then extinguished the hare.Once he was extinguished, the hare took off on foot trying to catch the tortoise. But he was too late. The tortoise won the race. The hare never wanted to race again.

The moral of this story is and will always be, “Slow and steady
wins the race.”



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