The sun was beaming through the windshield onto my forehead as I traveled down the long highway. The day was near perfect and I had no care in the world. That was before I heard my stomach start to rumble. Suddenly, it hit me! I needed to perform a bowel movement, and I needed to do it immediately. I clenched my cheeks and slammed on the accelerator as hard as my body would allow. I was only a few miles from my exit, but now it felt extremely distant. I had no time to waste, there was a storm brewing in my intestines.

     As I approached my exit, flashing lights peirced my rearview mirror. Beads of sweat began to gather on my forehead, chill bumps covered my body, and my hairs reached for the sun as a result of the pressure on my annus; not because I was nervous. I cautiously pulled to the side of the road and waited for the cop to approach the window. When he eventually reached my window, trying to intimidate me, he asked, "Sir, is there a reason you were going 95 in a 55? I could send you to jail for that."
    With tears flowing from my eyes, I responded, "Sir, I have to poop so bad." I watched the cop turn his nose up at me in disgust.
    "Since I feel like being nice today, I'll give you a ticket claiming you were going 70 in a 55. It's your lucky day," the officer rudely exclaimed. He returned to his cop car with my license and regristration to write me a ticket while I was still clenching my butt cheeks. I could now feel the presence of my waste inching out. Momentarily, I considered dashing into the woods to release the pressure, but decided against being the talk of the town.
    I screamed to the officer politely to "Please be quick, it's an emergancy!" Slowly, but surely, the officer returned with my belongings and a fowl odor awakened.
    He coughed and quickly responded, "drive safe," then rushed off to fresh air. It was too late. I sped the rest of the way home with my beat up truck windows down, airing out the stinch. I arrived home to dirty underwear greeting me as I pulled down my blue jeans. My first ticket and I had to throw away my favorite pair of underwear. An unforgettable way to end my day. I should have just went to McDonald's; never will I eat Mexican again.