June 3, 2010
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Beep, beep, beep, beep, the alarm went off like a rooster on a hen house in the morning. (Simile) Shining, sparkling, and pleasing me as I wake up in the morning, the sun was appearing into my window. (Participle) I got out of bed, got ready and was on my way downstairs for some breakfast. Then I got in the car, pulled out of my driveway and was on my way to work. As I was driving, I curved around the aquarium where I worked. (Action Verb) I walked into the aquarium and looked up, down, left and right, and felt like I was underwater. The environment was gorgeous; there were fish tanks everywhere and when you walked in the blue lights reflected off the water on to the walls. (Characters Environment) Then I saw Tracy, my trainer who trained me to feed animals and clean their cages, her long brown hair running down the side of her face, with her eyes of matching color and her clothes were very wet and raggedy from all the animals splashing her. (Character Appearance) Then, I was signing in and I couldn't get my time card in the slot. I tried again and again. I was so mad that I couldn't get my card in, so mad that I was going to be punched in late, and so mad that I was at the aquarium and I wasn't getting paid. (Repetition for effect) Finally, I punched in at 8:05; it wasn’t that bad, only five minutes late. I went with my trainer, Tracy, to feed the penguins. At that time, I gave her the ooh-this-ought-to-be-fun-look! (Hyphenated Modifier)When we got the buckets of fish, you could hear them sliming together as we walked, and the stench dragging behind us. I looked at Tracy’s bucket and I saw the fish oozing over the top, and when we got to the penguins we handed them to the penguins as they felt slimy and gross. The penguins loved the taste of the fish! (Specific Details for Effect) After we got done with the penguins, we went to go clean the shark cage! I was very scared because I had never been in the water with a shark before. I thought that being with a shark was scarier than being chased by a lion. (Metaphor) We got to the shark exhibit and put on our scuba diving suits. Tracy was very adventurous and loved to be with animals, so she was not scared of the sharks or this situation. (Stating what character is like) Next, we went to get the bait and jumped in the shark infested water. I was scared out of my mind with all the sharks around us.

“Be very careful and don’t flair your arms everywhere or else they could bite!” Tracy said.

I responded in a frightened voice, “Okay!” (Allowing Character to speak)

Tracy loved the sharks, she had no bad feelings and thought good of the sharks.(Thoughts and feelings of charter) While Tracy was swimming with the sharks she played with them and teased them a little bit, but not enough to bite her! (Characters Actions)The cocky shark, large and red-eyed determined to get the bait in her hand, started to swim after her! (Adjectives Shifted Out Of Order) Tracy hurried to get out of the water, as I was already out. Then I helped her out of the pool just in time before the shark nearly bit her. When we were out of the water and safe, we saw the shark, a mid-day predator who roams the water in search of food, eating a fish. (Appositive) We exited the shark exhibit and then went to have our afternoon snack. After our snack, we went to feed the seals. This time I was actually excited to see this type of animal, one that couldn’t eat me! We fed the seals by throwing small fish in to their mouth. As I edged along the side of the rocks, feet trembling, fish slipping, trying to feed the seals, I jumped off the rocks. (Appositive) Finally, we were finished feeding them, but better yet, I was done with work. I said goodbye to my trainer and went to the lobby to punch out. Luckily, this time I didn’t have trouble with my time card! When I got home, I laid on the couch and fell fast asleep. Beep, beep, beep, beep, the alarm went off. (Full circle ending) Then, I got up and thought here we go again. I hope I get signed in on time and my trainer doesn’t get bit!

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