Kiss This: Part 1
Author's note: I really wanted to share my story and teach others the misconceptions they go through in their... Show full author's note »
Peer-SpectiveIsabella and I started our education in Carrollton not long after. We had gone to Carrollton Elementary for a good two years before our mom asked us if we'd like to change schools. Bella was going into 6th grade, and I was going into 2nd. We both made new, inseparable, friends, and made a better source of our education by going to a Catholic school in Newport News, about fifteen minutes away. Our Lady of Mount Carmel, was where I learned the most, grew the most, and developed the most spiritually, and physically.
All that I remember my first year there was that I was ignorant and fake. I made good grades, but I wasn't forgiving, or real. I became a liar because my peers either made me feel uncomfortable or special. I was getting mixed reactions from my classmates especially when we had a new girl come in. She always told a big fat story about how she was on crutches because she was bitten by a shark, or that she went on vacation with Jesse McCartney because he was her second cousin. And everybody believed her. I personally believe that because she was really mean and I guess the people were afraid what would happen if they didn’t.
My 3rd grade year, was probably my best. I had the best teacher, best friends, and the best grades. I was really insecure, though because I was developing earlier than my classmates. I was taller than everybody, and I really, just, didn't fit in. But that changed when I met this girl on the bus named Julia. She was new that year and she rode my bus. We talked and talked and talked; and when it was time to get off the bus, I asked her where she lived, and she was getting off at my stop too! It turns out that she was my new neighbor! Ever since that day on the bus, I knew we’d be best friends.
All right, all right, I admit it; my fourth grade year was pretty rough. When I was about eight years old, my parents divorced. My sister wasn't happy about it, and since I didn't know what a divorce was, I just went along with my sister. I couldn't stand the fighting, so I knew that meant something. It took me almost three years to realize it wasn't my fault even though I went to my school counselor A LOT about it. I had friends praying for me, and I didn’t know why, either. It was just a time of not understanding anything, for me although I did understand that my parents would be in separate houses.
So during the summer before 5th grade, my mom moved to a neighborhood across the street (because my dad and her had a joint custody), and my dad kept the house that we were all originally living in. On top of that, Julia moved. It made me really sad, but also really excited for her, considering she was moving to New York. I wasn't worried about not seeing each other in a while, because we had already ended up spending time a lot in the two weeks she had before she left. We kept in touch after she left, but since those events, I’ve never really been the same.
I stayed at Our Lady of Mount Carmel until my 6th grade year. It was the same year that Bella was in the freshman year of high school at Warwick High; which happened to be across the street. I was really excited for her because she was in the I.B. program, and also because she was in high school. I knew she’d been waiting for this for along time, so it was kind of fun to go shopping with her. She was finally in public school again and I knew she had found her place. Eventually, she and I switched schools again in the sense to be closer to home and the free transportation back and forth. Unfortunately, I was too young to know what public school was like since I was brainwashed through private school by wearing the same plaid skirt everyday. My consequences weren't bad, but my peers always called me “teacher” because of how modest I dressed.
I think I looked better that way because after that I started getting comfortable; not turning in my homework, slipping grades, wearing no makeup and sweatpants to school, etc. I don't think I was fit for what was coming next: I was bullied constantly. I was called ‘fugly,’ and given notes that cited how fat I was, how ugly I was, and how stupid I was. It was all by the same person until he brought friends along. Some of them were my friends for years, and the rest of them were people I didn't even know. The only place where I ever felt safe was in band. I don't know why, but I think it was partly because I was surrounded with people with the same problems.
Sure we weren't an attractive bunch, considering most of us were more unattractive than others, but we were all friends. I think. That class really pushed me, you know? I worked harder in my classes, eventually, and at the end of my 7th grade year, I made more friends than I thought and came out with grades based on the thought that I was actually smarter than I thought I was.